50 Easy Ways to Be a (Much) More Romantic Man

 It's the little things that make her swoon.

To be clear: Despite what rom-coms and the above headline might imply, romance isn't simple. In fact, there's no formula, fix, or surefire move that will automatically make you worthy of a Luther Vandross lyric. That's because romance depends on so many factors—from your relationship status (are you courting or are you comfortable?) to all the other internal stuff that you bring to a relationship, a rendezvous, or any one moment in time. And that's not even including the factors like self-esteem and trust that influence how we give and receive romantic gestures throughout our lives.Despite romance's complexities, that doesn't mean you can't improve your amorous arsenal with your partner. After all, isn't the whole point to dance with your beloved through life in sync, close together, and maybe even a little sweaty, too? So read on, and learn how to raise your romance-level through the roof.

1.Hug Like a Dog

Hugs and kisses should have energy, says Dr. Jessica O'Reilly, host of the @SexWithDrJess Podcast. "Use your dog's energy and enthusiasm as inspiration," she says. "When a dog greets you with a wagging tail and affection, it calms your nerves and makes you feel loved."

2.Text an Emoji for No Reason

Shoot her the old "heart eyes" in the middle of the day.

3.Give This as a "Just Because" Gift

A favorite Instagram post of the two of you, printed and framed.

4.Commit to One Minute

Take 60 seconds every day to do something that makes your partner feel important, says O'Reilly. That can be anything from making their tea to warming up the car to cleaning a laptop screen. "Small favors pack a huge punch in terms of maintain the connection," she says. "When you make them feel important, they benefit from a boost in serotonin, which can help you ignite passion in the relationship."

5.Thanking for the Little Things Means a Lot

Say thank you for things you take for granted, like grocery shopping or any kind of run-of-the-mill responsibilities, says O'Reilly. It reduces the resentment and increases the harmony, she says.

6.You Can Never Go Wrong With Extra Attention

To the neck.

7.Warm Wins

Greet your partner exiting the shower with a towel you just took out of the dryer.

8.Memorize the Law of Floral Relativity

Getting flowers < knowing which flowers to get < Surprising with flowers for no reason at all.

9.Memorize the Law of Domestic Relativity

Doing chores < doing your partner's chores < cleaning the toilet/sheets/towels before they need cleaning.

10.Memorize the Law of Social Media Relativity

Posting < commenting < keeping it to yourself.

11.Prepare More Meals Together

Ava Cadell, Ph.D., author of Neuroloveology: The Power of Mindful Love & Sex, recommends a fruit salad as the go-to dish. "I know it sounds simple," she says, "but once you stand by side, slicing juicy mangos, peaches, oranges, plums, and apricots, it won't be long until you'll be feeding each other the succulent fruit."

12.Back Off Sometimes

Smothering may work for butter, gravy, and marinara, but not for relationships. Time alone makes for better time together.

13.Say These Phrases More Often

"You look…"

"Miss you."

"Wanna dance?"

14.Say These Phrases Much Less

"Wanna [other verb]?"

"I think."

"Dilly dilly."

15.New Never Gets Old

Date night for long-term couples should use strategies from short-term couples: Trying something new each time. Studies show that novelty is good for romance. It can be as simple as driving across town for dinner to get away from routine spots or more elaborate outings like doing some kind of weekend retreat that focuses on something like cooking or yoga. 

16.Take Turns Taking Charge

Goes for decision-making, meal-making, love-making.

17.Sugar Needs to Overpower the Salt

Research shows that when communicating with a partner, you need to make five positive comments for every negative one, says Sadie Leder Elder, Ph.D., associate professor at High Point University who studies romantic relationships.

18.It's Better in Real Life Than in an Emoji

A wink is only effective if it comes sparingly and selectively.

19.Volunteer Together

Research shows that those who do something altruistic outside of the relationship have a better connection.

20.Write More

Love notes are good. I'm-sorry notes are better.

21.Cheer!

Treat good news from your partner the way you would a sporting event. A study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found better relationship satisfaction when a person was very enthusiastic about good news from their partner.

22.Play

Ping pong.

23.Untether When You're Together.

A Baylor University study found lower relationship satisfaction when couples perceived their partners choosing their phones over them.

24.Don't Try Too Hard

Cliché that doesn't come off like one: Wine, pizza, and a movie. Cliché that does: 4-foot tall stuffed animals.

25.Share

Dessert. The remote. Laps.

26.Do Not Share

Toothbrushes. Offices. Sub-tweets about your relationship.

27.Schedule Some Stealth Convo Time

If logistically possible, carpool every so often. It's a chance to catch up and slow down in an otherwise hectic schedule.

28.Get Away

Hike a little more. Hustle a little less.

29.Accordion the Way You Touch Each Other

Vary from so-so-so-so light to love-love-you tight.

30.Shop for Smells

Candles can bring different scents into your home, but you can make the smells even more personal by taking a trip to a spice or herb market and picking out ones you both like, Cadell says. Combine them to make a customized bowl of scents for the bedroom.

31.Summons Your Inner Detective

Notice something that never gets noticed.

32.Give In

You don't need to win every disagreement. The willingness to sacrifice is a big component of increasing connectedness in a relationship, Elder says.

33.Practice Patience

Undress yourselves slowly and silently, Cadell suggests. Watch. Listen. Wait.

34.Good Ears Will Never Let You Down

Tune in for birthday-present hints starting at 180 days out, not 180 minutes.

35.Text for More Than Logistics

Wordplay is foreplay.

36.After-play Is As Important

One recent study showed that both relationship and sexual satisfaction increased when as much time was spent being close with each other after sex as it was beforehand.

37.Customize Every Toast

When you clink glasses, say something short, say something specific, say something sneaky. "For helping our daughter with her history project" trumps "Cheers."

38.Volley, Volley, Volley

Ask more than you answer.

39.Add This to Your Shopping List

One of Cadell's favorite ways to sweeten sex is a game using honey, your body, and blindfold.

40.Use Your Bathroom Better

Shave her legs. Shave his face. Hot water, lather, steam, skin, and sharp objects make a cocktail of trust and sensuality.

40.Keep Your Eyes Open During Sex

Especially at the most vulnerable moment, Cadell says. "Even sexier than seeing is to truly feel like you are being seen," she says.

41.Get Away to Get Together

Vacations, even for one night, can start the simmering. Vacations, if they involve bathing suits and bodies of water, raise the temp to boiling.

42.Read the Most Important Sentence in This Whole Piece

The most underrated use of your own tongue: Biting it.

43.Surprise More

Remembering a wedding anniversary is a given. Remembering a stealthier anniversary—a first date, a first sight—is golden.

44.Forgive Mistakes More Easily

People with high self-esteem report having higher levels of connectedness, Elder says. Part of that comes from feelings of unconditional love—the kind that parents give children, she says. That doesn't mean you can't have conflict, but forgiveness shows relationships are less fragile.

45.Share Content

Send an appropriate-to-your-partner story link with the subject line "reminded me of you."

46.Walk the Dog Together

And not as a chore. It's a time to bond, a time to chat, and a time to—literally and metaphorically—show that you're willing to be the one to clean up the crap.

47.Commit to 15 Minutes

One night a week, help each other stretch before bed.

48.Be Kind

To your partner's other circles—friends, family, co-workers—even if you mix together like OJ and toothpaste.

49.Compliment

Accomplishments as much as—if not more than—appearances.

50.Hold Hands

When nobody is watching. When everybody is watching.

Ted Spiker

This Is Exactly How You Can Have More Energy in the Morning

 From a cold shower to a cup of matcha, here's how to get a morning energy boost. 

Despite what you may think, not many people jump out of bed feeling like the Energizer bunny every day. Even your friends who power through their mornings without any grogginess in sight probably had to put in the effort to get there—and there are some simple tactics anyone can do to get on their level. Whether it's adding a few extra steps to your morning routine, switching up your breakfast, or reexamining the eight hours before you open your eyes, these are the changes you can make now to up your energy levels.

1.Put yourself first.

How often do you wake up and instantly start going through your email before getting out of bed? Even if you initially woke up with energy, that's a surefire way to zap it. Instead, Hilary Hinrichs, the New York City-based health and nutrition coach behind Holistic Hilary, recommends taking time for yourself before you dive into work and catching up on messages."A great way to help ease stress and have a more productive morning is by putting yourself first," she says. "Stress can deplete energy, so avoiding things like emails, social media, or texts until you absolutely need to check them can keep your morning energy levels up."

2.Get in some light exercise.

Moving your body first-thing in the morning can help wake you up and increase your energy for the day. "Engaging in some light exercise or going on a walk in the morning is an easy way to uplift your mood," Hinrichs says. Even 10 minutes of yoga or a quick HIIT workout will help. Do whatever feels best for you, and you'll reap the energy-boosting benefits.

3.Don't drink coffee right after waking up.

If you tend to pour yourself a cup of coffee in the morning in order to get an energy boost, switch up your habits and go for water or herbal tea first—two things Hinrichs says will energize your mornings much better than a cup of joe."Staying hydrated is crucial for energy levels to stay up all morning long," she says. "Even though most people love drinking coffee, it's not only dehydrating but can also cause you to crash earlier when you drink it right away. By putting coffee off for a few hours, you'll wake up more naturally."

4.Dim or turn off lights at least 30 minutes before bed.

According to Hinrichs, sometimes having more energy in the morning starts the night before. And the best thing you can do to wake up feeling more energized is dim the lights around your bedtime."A great way to increase energy in the morning is by avoiding lights at least 30 minutes before the time you'd like to fall asleep," Hinrichs says. "This can help naturally increase melatonin in your body to alert your brain that it's time for bed. When we have lights on, it can act similar to the sun keeping us more alert and make it harder to fall asleep at night."

5.Put away your phone before going to bed.

Speaking of the night before, there's one other thing you can do, too. Not only does your phone emit blue light that messes with your sleep, but that endless scrolling can also stress you out before bed—two things that won't have you waking up feeling happy and energized. "Place your phone out of reach in order to avoid checking it over and over again," Hinrichs says. By doing so, you'll start your day much more refreshed, both mentally and physically.

6.Eat healthy fats.

If you want long-lasting energy, the key is adding in healthy fats. That way you won't be left hungry and tired an hour after eating. "I recommend keeping several healthy fats in your kitchen so you can easily add them to your breakfast," says Amy Gorin, MS, RDN, a plant-based registered dietitian in the New York City area. "For instance, pistachios add delicious satiating plant-based protein, fiber, and better-for-you mono- and polyunsaturated fat to [your] oatmeal and yogurt parfaits. I'd also recommend keeping avocado on hand as a topping for omelets or breakfast burritos."

7.And get some protein.

Are you getting enough protein in your breakfast? According to Gorin, it's an important complement to fiber and healthy fats. "Whether your protein of choice is a couple of eggs, beans in a breakfast rice bowl, or Greek yogurt in a parfait, having ample protein in your breakfast will help your meal stay with you for longer—which means more energy," she says.

8.Drink plenty of water.

Gorin says every day should begin by drinking water, as it's not only a way to combat headaches, but also fatigue. "Accomplish this however works best for you, whether that means leaving a bottle of water on your nightstand or pairing a large glass of water with your breakfast," she says. "You can even infuse fruit such as strawberries in a pitcher of water overnight."

9.Eat more fresh fruit.

Having some fruit first thing in the morning is one of the most simple ways to up your energy. "It can be a great way to gently wake up your digestive system," Hinrichs says. "It contains fiber, is full of nutrients, and has the healthy carbohydrates our bodies thrive on for energy. Whether you're pairing fruit with oats, making a smoothie, or eating it on its own, any of those options can be a great way to energize you in the morning."

10.Try some matcha.

Matcha is one of the best morning beverages for upping your energy levels. Although it contains caffeine, it's different than coffee in that it's balanced out with L-theanine and therefore energizes you more slowly—aka there's no sudden crash an hour later. You can sip it as a tea, or make a frothy matcha latte."L-theanine promotes both alertness and calm at the same time," Michael J. Breus, PhD, a clinical psychologist and sleep expert in Manhattan Beach, California, wrote on his website. "It can put you in a state of wakeful relaxation, reducing stress and anxiety while at the same time improving focus and concentration."

11.Limit how much negative news you consume.

A lot of people start their day by turning on the news, reading the newspaper, or checking the latest headlines online to see what's happening in the world. But according to the Mayo Clinic, news overdose is a thing, and it can really get you down—especially with everything happening in the world right now. Instead of letting the negativity suck all your energy, do something happier first-thing instead.

12.Get some fresh air and sunshine.

What's more simple than stepping outside in order to give your energy levels a boost? A past study in the journal Environmental Health Perspectives found the exposure to bright morning light can be effective against insomnia, making you feel less tired and more energized. Bonus: It can also help with seasonal affective disorder (SAD).

13.Take a cold shower

Kicking your day off with an ice-cold shower might not sound pleasant, but it's a proven way to up your energy in the mornings. A 2016 study published in PLoS One found 91 percent of the participants wanted to continue their cold shower routine after the study ended because of how energized it made them feel in the mornings. In fact, they said it gave them a similar effect to drinking caffeine. When you shower, finish with at least 30 seconds of cold water to reap the benefits.

Tehrene Firman