How to Write a Love Letter to Your Partner

 Can you remember the last time you sat down with a pen and paper to handwrite a letter to your significant other? If the answer is no, you’re definitely not alone. Living in the era of DMs and heart emojis, it’s easy to forget how one of the most treasured ways to say "I love you" is still a good old-fashioned letter. Whether you’re dating, engaged, or have been together forever, letting your partner know how much they mean to you with a tangible note is always a swoon-worthy move.“The vulnerable authenticity of a love letter is what will take [your partner’s] breath away,” explains couples counselor and writer Donna Keehn. We caught up with her to learn how to write a love letter from the heart and find inspiration.“Remember,” she says, “your love letter is not meant to compete with all of the other love letters that exist ... [and] as long as the words expressed are sincere, it will be absolutely perfect for the person lucky enough to receive it.” Ready to get started? Below is everything you need to know to write a love letter.

What to Include in Your Love Letter

1. Start With a Meaningful Greeting 

“With a love letter, the greeting can immediately reflect the depth of your connection and love,” Keehn shares. “But just because you’re being vulnerable and romantic doesn’t mean your tone has to be strictly formal.” Addressing your partner with a cherished nickname like ‘Sweetie Pie,’ ‘Love Nugget,’ or ‘Buttercup' can be just as touching as something like 'My Love.' Also, when in doubt, simply starting with your partner’s first name is intimate in its own way.

2. Recall Romantic Moments  

Reflecting on and sharing specific moments when you “knew” you loved someone is a beautiful start to the heart of the letter. Keehn suggests asking yourself, “Did you experience a moment where you realized all of the ways having this human being in your life has changed you [and] your life for the better? Think about these shared moments in a timeline fashion and capture the experiences and emotions in free-flow writing.” 

3. Write Out the “Why’s” 

Instead of going vague with statements such as “I love your personality,” Keehn encourages digging deeper and exploring the “why” behind what it is you love about someone. Without filtering yourself, try to articulate “why you love their personality, their character, their kindness, their generosity, their touch...” Capture that magic!

4. Close With Candor 

This is the time to express how it really feels now that this person is in your life. “Don’t be shy!” Keehn laughs, “Put yourself fully out there at the end and toss insecurities to the wind.” As for the final line itself, you can of course never go wrong in baring it all through a simple, powerful ‘I love you.’

Tips for Getting Started (and Finishing Strong!)

Just Relax

Don’t know where to start, or having trouble finding a creative flow? “Take a deep breath, close your eyes, and think about your partner,” Keehn says, “[and] let your heart and head fill up with their presence.” By creating a safe space for yourself, thoughts, feelings, and words will start to bubble up without judgment. When they do, just write without worrying about how it sounds. Poetic phrases, concrete statements, and sweet nothings are all perfect. “If you’re feeling stuck,” she adds, “turn to outside inspiration, such as existing love letters, marriage vows, and, of course, Shakespeare, to guide the way.” 

Take Your Time 

For a love letter that doesn’t feel trivial or forced, Keehn suggests going slow and piecing it together a bit at a time. “The vast majority of us want to rush through something when it feels awkward or outside of our comfort zone,” she says, “but when you think about it, just about everything we do, even really big things, are done in small steps…”

Pick a Personalized Medium 

Yay, you’ve written the content of your letter! A fun and, often overlooked, component of the letter itself, is what you write it on. “Let yourself have fun!” Keehn says, “The love letter doesn’t have to be on a fancy piece of stationary to be special.” 

Iconic Love Letter Examples

To leave you feeling inspired, we’ve rounded up some of the most iconic love letters of all time.

Johnny Cash to his wife June:

“Happy Birthday Princess,

We get old and get used to each other. We think alike. We read each other’s minds. We know what the other wants without asking. Sometimes we irritate each other a little bit. Maybe sometimes we take each other for granted. 

But once in a while, like today, I meditate on it and realize how lucky I am to share my life with the greatest woman I ever met. You still fascinate and inspire me. You influence me for the better. You’re the object of my desire, the #1 Earthly reason for my existence. I love you very much. Happy Birthday Princess - John”

Composer John Cage to Merce Cunningham: 

“Today is beautiful and I am dreaming of you and enigma and how we are together today: your words in my ears making [me] limp and taut by turns with delight. Oh, I am sure we could use each other today. 

I like to believe that you are writing my music now: God knows I’m not doing it, because it simply seems to happen. The pretissimo is incredible the way you are and is perhaps a song and description about you … Pardon the intrusion, but when in September will you be back? I would like to measure my breath in relation to the air between us.”

Frida Kahlo to Diego Rivera:

“Diego, 

Nothing compares to your hands, nothing like the green-gold of your eyes. My body is filled with you for days and days. You are the mirror of the night. The violent flash of lightning. The dampness of the earth. The hollow of your armpits is my shelter. My fingers touch your blood. 

All my joy is to feel life spring from your flower-fountain that mine keeps to fill all the paths of my nerves which are yours.” 

Lindsey Black

Fact checked by Cherisse Harris

What Are the Five Love Languages?

 Could you and your partner’s romantic spark use a boost? Whether you’re living together or are worlds away, letting your special someone know how much you treasure them (and feeling that affection in return) isn’t always easy. If it’s ever felt like you two are speaking different languages when it comes to how you communicate love, the truth is, you very well might be!In Dr. Gary Chapman’s groundbreaking work, “The Five Love Languages: How to Express Commitment to Your Mate,” he categorizes five general ways romantic partners express and experience love:

  1.Words of Affirmation

  2.Quality Time

  3.Acts of Service

  4.Receiving Gifts

  5.Physical Touch

To help explore what each of these means and how to incorporate them in your own love story, we reached out to Donna Keehn, a licensed marriage and family therapist. Keehn frequently utilizes the concept of love languages when working with her clients, and considers them a wonderful tool to play with. As it turns out, the insight they offer can bring both immediate and lasting positive change to any relationship dynamic.“So much of the time, especially in working with couples, each partner has no idea of their own love language, let alone their partner’s love language, which can leave both feeling continually disregarded, unappreciated, and unloved despite trying hard to connect,” Keehn explains. “That’s why I believe it’s so important to understand our own love language, as the more self-awareness we have, the more emotional intelligence we have...the more we can connect to others, including our romantic partner, in healthy ways.” Below, Keehn dives into all five categories with tips for integrating each into your life and recommends paying close attention to which category best reflects how you like to give and receive love.

Words of Affirmation

“Typically, people who connect with this love language value feeling appreciated, loved, and understood by their romantic partners through verbal acknowledgments (aka showing affection through words),” says Keehn. To get a sense of this love language in action, she shares how “tender ‘I love you’s,’ heartfelt compliments, and words of encouragement, support, and appreciation” are all perfect examples.As for incorporating this love language into your relationship, Keehn has good news: “This love language can be so easily expressed, and in so many ways!” She suggests using a variety of mediums to share meaningful words with your partner, such as social media platforms, texting, handwritten notes, and, of course, simply speaking to them directly.

Quality Time

“People who resonate with this love language value feeling fully seen, accepted, and adored through sharing intentional time with their partner free of phones, television, and social media,” says Keehn. Laughing, she adds, “Just step away from the screens!” While sometimes difficult to cultivate given all of the distractions around us, there are plenty of ways big and small to honor this love language and find one on one time: “A brief moment of intense connection, deep conversations with focused eye contact, a planned getaway where privacy abounds adds up...anything that fosters active and intentional time to connect give undivided attention is perfect.” 

Acts of Service

You know the phrase “actions speak louder than words”? That’s this love language’s motto! “Acts of Service is the love language of doing things for your partner, most often in an attempt to make their lives easier,” explains Keehn. “If this is your primary love language, you value feelings of being deeply cherished, appreciated, and not being taken for granted.” To connect with a partner who “speaks” this love language, try to provide comfort in times of stress, and proactively look for opportunities to lighten their load “even if it means having to go out of your way” encourages Keehn. 

Receiving Gifts

Receiving Gifts is the love language of gift-giving and, don’t stress, a gift’s worth isn’t attached to a price tag here. As Keehn explains, “A common misconception of this love language is that the gift must have a dollar value (the higher the monetary value, the better the gift) but, in reality, it’s all about the perceived value in terms of thoughtfulness.”She adds, “People who have Receiving Gifts as their primary love language often talk about the symbolism behind the gifts, and the emotions they invoke, including joy, laughter, and feeling really seen and valued.” The key to being a gift-giver in this dynamic is in making sure a gift really “reflects your partner’s world, their interests, their desires, their favorite things/experiences, etc.”

Physical Touch

“First things first, let’s get this clear,” laughs Keehn, “the love language of Physical Touch encompasses so much more than sexual intimacy!” She explains, “Physical Touch can also be thought of as Meaningful Touch, and this love language is really about showing love through physical expressions [such as] holding hands, kissing, hugging, cuddling, and more.” What people who have Physical Touch as their primary love language ultimately value is “the deep emotional intimacy they experience with their partners when touch is involved, whether it be non-sexual or sexual in nature.”As for a fun way to explore this love language? “I tell couples to turn in toward each other (full-on eye contact) along with some physical touch (such as holding hands), for thirty seconds (I set a timer),” says Keehn. “Without fail, they are shocked at how deeply connected they can feel in that short of time [and how] the feeling of connectedness carries them through thick and thin and beyond!”

Lindsey Black

Fact checked by Cherisse Harris

23 Signs Your Boyfriend Really Loves You

 He’s probably the type of guy who always says, “I love you” but how can you really tell that he does? If only finding the answer is as easy as plucking petals off a flower, then you don’t have to worry anymore. I hope everyone knows that words are just words, and it’s still actions that really count. Not all people who say those three words and eight letters really mean it. Love is a tricky thing, so you should be wise as well.

23 Signs Your Boyfriend Really Loves You

Find out the answer as you read through the signs I listed down if your boyfriend really loves you.

1. He always makes a great effort.

A boyfriend who truly loves you will not be contented with making mediocre efforts because he always wants the best for you. Even if it’s too much for him, he will do it because he’s happy to do it.

2. He always finds a way to be with you. 

A guy who truly loves you will free his time for you no matter how hectic his schedule is. Remember that there is a big difference between someone who frees his time to talk to you and someone who talks to you during his free time.

3. He stares at you as his dream has finally come true.

He looks at you like he can’t believe you’re with him. This is the kind of guy who is not looking at you for lust and desire, but rather it’s a look reserved only for you. I have to admit I find this sweet, especially if my boyfriend tells me, “I can’t believe someone like you is already mine.” I can’t help but shudder in delight every time I hear this, and I feel his love for me.

4. He can’t keep his hands off.

Being in love with you means he loves to stay close to you, touch you, and hold your hand. Touching you in different ways like stroking a stray hair off your face or holding your hands in public shows how much he adores you and how proud and lucky he is to have you.

5. He makes you laugh.

The first hint of love to look out for is if he makes an effort to make you laugh every day. He never passes up the opportunity to make a joke or to make a silly face because your laughter is probably music to his ears. Humor is one of the ways guys do sneak into a girl’s heart, so you better hold him up and tell him that he’s already there.If he is comfortable enough to make a fool of himself to make you laugh, then there is no doubt that he is in love with you. A guy who is into you loves to see you smile and will do everything he can to bring it out, especially when you’re feeling down.

6. He cuddles you like a baby. 

If he loves to cuddle you with pure love and affection, then you’re lucky enough to have him. A guy who loves to embrace his girl like she’s a baby is a sign of gentle love. It could also be a sign that you are a precious treasure to keep and handle with care for him.

7. He misses you when you’re apart.

When a guy loves someone, he longs for her presence and misses her when she’s gone, even if he sees each other for like an hour. He will make a call or send text messages just to talk to you and feel like you’re with him though you’re far.

8. He doesn’t give up.

He doesn’t quit without a good fight. No matter what your relationship has, he will try his best to find a solution to solve it. He doesn’t care what others will say. He always endures, and he doesn’t lose hope.

9. He gets jealous but knows how to control it.

To get jealous is just normal in a relationship because it is a sign of overflowing love. It is also a sign that he’s afraid to lose you. However, a guy who truly loves you will not be overly jealous because he understands that it is bad for you and your relationship.

10. He pauses his favorite video game to talk to you.

We all know that there is something about games and guys that are just inseparable. But when he pauses his video game or cancels his night out with friends to talk and be with you, he surely prioritizes and adores you.

11. He tells you his secrets.

Men are usually secretive and avoid emotional discussions. If he tells you his deepest, darkest secrets, and isn’t afraid to be emotionally vulnerable to you, then that’s a definite sign that he loves and trusts you. He has invited you inside his personal bubble, a level of closeness that you won’t share with anyone else.A guy who has nothing to hide is better than someone who tends to be very mysterious and sketchy. If he opens up about things he never even dare to tell his closest buddies, then it means he trusts you and really loves you.

12. He includes you in his plans.

If a guy includes you in his plans, it shows that he sees you as part of his future. Guys wouldn’t do that unless they consider the girl as their life partner.

13. He makes you his priority.

If he makes you his priority, he will consider you a special person, and a special person means extra attention, extra effort, and on top of the priority list. Another bonus thing is if he goes the extra mile, never to make you feel neglected.

14. He introduces you to his family and friends.

He shows you off around his friends. You are part of his social circle, and you know it because you’re always there when he hangs out with his friends. He invites you to their parties and brings you as his plus one to all sorts of occasions. It’s not only that, and he’s not afraid to show you off, tell his friends how proud he is of you, and how much happiness you bring into his life.You’ll know if the guy is serious about you when he introduces you to his family and friends. This takes the relationship to another level, and not all guys are ready for that unless he’s in love with you.

15. He texts you each morning and night.

You know he’s in love with you when he texts you “good morning” the moment he wakes up and asks, “how’s your day?” before he goes to bed to make sure you’re alright. These acts show that he thinks of you every day and night, and that’s when you know you’ve got him.

16. He stands by you through good times and bad times.

When a guy truly loves you, nothing will be more important than being there for you in times of trouble. He’ll step up and be there no matter what the situation is.

17. He forgives you.

If he really loves you, he can’t stay mad at you for too long without regretting it. He’ll make the first move and apologize even if he’s not wrong.

18. He respects you if he really loves you.

Love is all about respect. You’ll know he’s in love with you if he respects your decision, opinion, and everything about you.He supports you in anything that you do. One way of showing love is showing support, so if you constantly find him as your number one cheerleader, then it’s highly likely that he loves you. He would never want a loved one to feel like he doesn’t care at all or he disapproves of your dreams.

19. He wants you to be yourself.

He wants you to be yourself, and why is this? Because he really loves you for who you are, he would never want you to be anybody else. He truly loves you if he lets you be the most authentic and best version of yourself because he accepts every special thing and every flaw about you.

20. He loves spending for you.

Whether it is time or money, if you become his priority, he’ll sacrifice these things for you. He’ll love giving gifts for you, paying for your meal, or spending time with you when he could be working. It doesn’t matter how expensive it is, but what matters is how much he is willing to sacrifice.

21. He always makes sure that you’re safe.

Suppose he makes sure that you’re safe all the time. He either drives you home or calls you immediately to check if you got back safely, he steers away from sketchy areas when you’re both walking, or he randomly checks up on you to see how you’re doing. Your well-being is his priority, and of course, he wouldn’t want anything terrible to happen to someone he loves.

22. He gives you sweet surprises.

He gives you sweet surprises. It doesn’t have to be anything big because it can only be a cute stuffed toy, a few pieces of roses, or just a small box of chocolate. The important thing is the thought, effort, and time that went to put it together. If you’re not anyone special to him, then why should he be taking the time to give you surprises, right?

23. He is proud of you.

He wants you to live your life unapologetically, and no matter what you do, no matter which path you take or decision you make, he never fails to let you know that he is proud otherwise. When you love a person, you will celebrate that person’s victories and comfort him in his failures, and this is something he’s very much willing to do as well.

A poor guy who only has $100 in his pocket but has bought you something worth $200 is a better lover than a rich guy who has $1 million but has only bought you something worth $100,000.

There are no specific ways on how you’ll find out that the guy is really in love with you because, at the end of the day, it’s still up to your own feelings and instinct. But I hope these signs can be your guide so you would know what to look out for in your boyfriend beyond his every “I love you.”

Marydel Mitch Flores

36 Questions to Ask Your Partner That Lead to Love

 Everyone wants a magical formula to fall in love. Wouldn't it be great if there was a guaranteed, scientifically proven exercise to build true connection and romance? That doesn't exist exactly, but there is at least one way to try and take matters into your own hands.Art Aron, Ph.D., wrote a list of 36 questions that are scientifically proven to create connection and closeness among humans. They are not specifically designed to foster romantic connection—they work for friendship or business relationships, for example—but these questions have been tried and tested by many couples who claim that answering helped them make great strides in the love department.To learn more about the 36 questions, we interviewed Dr. Aron and asked him to explain why this exercise leads to connection and how couples should use it in their own lives. Read on to find out what he had to say and get a list of the questions for you to try at home.

How Do the 36 Questions Work?

The methodology behind the 36 questions is relatively simple. Dr. Aron first studied the factors that determine what makes people fall in love and then drafted questions to manufacture what is needed.For example, he found that in order for people to fall in love they have to think the other person likes them. "We set up experiments where we set up people to feel romantic connections," he explains. "What we found is probably the single strongest predictor is thinking the other person likes you. People want to think that being hard to get is a good thing. The evidence shows that it's good for people to think you are hard for others to get, but it doesn't help if they think they can't get you."So many of the questions are designed to help each person think the other likes him or her. "There are a lot of questions like, 'Name some things you've noticed about the other person that you like," he says.Another crucial component of true love is the ability to be vulnerable around one another. "What we've learned is what matters not so much as self-disclosure but feeling the other person's responsiveness," adds Dr. Aron. "You want to know the other person cares about you." Accordingly, many of the questions urge both partners to open up and share deep thoughts they might not have in the past.Through his studies, Dr. Aron also found that feeling like you have things in common really matters for connection. "Actually having things in common doesn't really matter," he notes. "Thinking you have some things in common does." So many of the questions ask the couple to take note and share similarities they believe they have.

How to Use the Questions

Dr. Aron gives a warning to anyone using the questions: While the exercise will certainly deepen your connection to someone, there is no guarantee it will lead to love. "This procedure should deepen the relationship, but it doesn't necessarily make you fall in love," he says. "If everything else is in place it won't hurt. There are no negatives."If you want to try them anyway, he says it's essential to take turns answering one question at a time. "If you reveal deep things to the other person, and then they reveal them to you, you feel safe about it," he shares. "You are likely to be responsive because it's been going back and forth. This part is crucial. Studies show if you answer all the questions and then your partner answers all the questions you don't get the same results."Also, use the procedure sparingly. "You have to be careful with the procedure. You can't use it too many times because your answers will become rote," he warns. "If you are going to use it more than a few times, you need to make up some questions of your own. You can sort of look at the kinds of questions and come up with other ones."

The 36 Questions

Set One

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

4. What would constitute a "perfect" day for you?

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

Set Two

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future, or anything else, what would you want to know?

14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

16. What do you value most in a friendship?

17. What is your most treasured memory?

18. What is your most terrible memory?

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?

20. What does friendship mean to you?

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?

Set Three

25. Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "We are both in this room feeling..."

26. Complete this sentence: "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you on how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen. 

Alyson Krueger

20 Cute Signs She Loves You Secretly

 Do you have this girl friend who seems weird whenever you are around? Are you suspecting that she actually loves you but cannot just express it?

Most girls are naturally sweet, but those who are in love are very easy to read too. If you are a sensitive person, you can feel if she is treating you special. However, if you are unsure of how she acts around you, the following signs may actually help you confirm.

Attention

One of the obvious signs of a person in love is how they crave the attention of the one they like. To the same extent, they love giving attention to that person as well.

1. She Cares about What You Think of Her.

Does she always ask you about how she looks? Or if you like her dress or new hair? Or does she ask you what you want her to change about herself? If your perception is a great deal to her, there is a big possibility that she likes you.

2. She Always Wants to Catch Your Attention.

Another sign that she is secretly in love with you is being an attention-seeker—not just anybody’s attention, but yours. For instance, she would excitedly show you her new painting or ask you to listen to the new song she recorded on her phone.

3. She Dresses to Impress Whenever You Will Be Around.

Have you ever noticed that she is always more glamorous whenever your meeting is planned than when you just accidentally bump into each other? It is possible that she really prepares for your meetups because she wants you to see her beauty.

4. She Showers You with Attention.

You can confirm the girl’s affection for you by how she attends to you. Even when you are with a group, you can observe how her eyes are only for you. Whenever you say something, she is your avid listener, and she will always be the first one to respond. Expect also that she will notice every little thing about you.

5. She Likes Having You Alone to Herself.

Have you ever noticed how she likes it better when you are alone together? She is happier and livelier whenever it is just the two of you. Then, you can observe how her mood dampens whenever someone joins you.

6. She Blushes When You Compliment Her.

Another sign that you are special to your friend is how she responds to your praises. She could blush or suddenly feel awkward for a moment whenever you give her a compliment. You might even catch that faint smile she tries to stop from showing on her face.

Care

You would know how you matter to a person based on how they care for you. If you notice genuine care, surely, there is love. 

7. She is Concerned about You.

If this girl is always worried about your welfare, like when you are sick, it is a clear sign of affection. Also, whenever you are going through something, she probably annoys you with her unending encouragement and reminders.

8. She is Always the First to Respond When You Need Help.

How long does it take for this girl to respond to your request for help? If she never fails to be available whenever you need a hand, she truly cares about you. How about if she is willing to sacrifice whatever she is doing—no matter how important it is—just to be there for you?

9. She is Willing to Be Your Shoulder to Cry On.

This girl loves lending you an ear. She is always available whenever you need someone to talk to. In addition, she will always assure you that you can trust her with your secrets.

10. She Always Checks on You.

Whether you are sick or not, this girl who secretly loves you will always express her concern. If not every day, she probably messages you at least once or twice a week. And most of the time, she always types in the magic words “how are you”.

11. She Defends You.

This girl will always stand by your side. Even if you are not around and she hears someone badmouthing you, she would not tolerate them. Expect her to defend you even to the point of getting into a fight. That is how loyal she is.

Value

Love makes a person special to someone. It compels an individual to walk an extra mile for that person they hold close to their heart.

12. She Appreciates Every Small Thing You Do for Her.

If a girl loves you, she will treasure your kindness to her. Expect that she will not forget the burger you gave her one afternoon two years ago. Also, do not be annoyed if she keeps thanking you for some help even it was too small for you.

13. She Thanks You All the Time.

Talking about gratitude, she overflows with it whenever you meet. She will not forget to thank you for almost everything. She would even thank you for picking up the trash along the corridor and for helping the lady cross the road.

14. She Treasures the Simple Gifts You Gave Her Long Time Ago.

Did you give her a small token three years ago? Have you given her a simple birthday card months before? Expect that these, among other things you have given this girl, are carefully tucked in a treasure box. Why not try asking about them?

15. She Expresses How Important You are to Her.

She may not directly express that she loves you, but this girl will not shy away from conveying how she cares about you.  She would probably tell you that you are her best friend or you mean more than a brother to her.

16. She is Often the First One to Greet You on Your Birthday.

Does she make sure she is the first one to greet you on your birthday by messaging or calling you at exactly 12 midnight? If she is this thoughtful, it only means that you are truly special to her.

Attachment

Girls who are in love are normally attached to the guys they like. They are normally comfortable and vulnerable with them.

17. She Tells You Her Secrets.

Is she open to you about her thoughts, feelings, and even secrets? If yes, it is possible that it is not only about trust. She is probably opening her world to you because she wants you to be part of it.

18. She Always Calls and Talks to You When Needing Comfort.

And what about whenever she is not okay? Are you the first person she usually looks for whenever she feels like crying? If you are, it means that you are home to her. And your presence is her source of comfort.

19. She is Clingy to You.

It is usual for less mature girls to be clingy to the guys they love. So, if this friend of yours does not leave your side whenever you are around, you have a clue why. She cannot resist the urge to be with you.

20. She Appears Jealous When You Talk to Other Girls.

Have you ever noticed how she suddenly becomes irritable and moody whenever you are enjoying the company of other girls? Then, whenever you try to engage her, she refuses and may even walk away.

Cyril Abello

30 Conversation Starters for Texting That Go Beyond "Hey"

 For most of us, texting multiple people throughout the day is as normal as brushing our teeth or fixing dinner after work. We don't necessarily think about the thousands of tiny bubbles we've sent between loved ones over the years—we just continue building on them, one response after another. That is, unless, we've received a new number and the message screen is blank. Now, you need to figure out the right conversation starter text to send."Starting a text conversation depends on the scenario," Carmelia Ray, an online dating expert and advisor to the WooYouApp, says. "You want to be really mindful of the personality type and communication preference of the person."

The Pros and Cons of Texting

We all know that the ease of texting makes it the preferred choice for simple conversations or for multitasking, and experts say it can help introverts especially manage interactions. Most of us are experienced with the downsides of that convenience, too, which Ray calls the "misrepresentation and misunderstanding" that occurs when tone and context are lost. Case in point: A Psychology Today article writes just 7 percent of communication happens through the content of the message, while everything else happens through body language, vocal tone, emphasis, and pitch.Similarly, there are some conversations that are better off having over the phone or in-person. Take it from relationship expert Lisa Concepcion of LoveQuest Coaching. "My rule of thumb is, if you can't express something in two easy sentences, then it's too heavy a topic for text. Pick up the phone and have a conversation," Concepcion says.Either way, when it comes to building a relationship with someone new—romantic or not—texting, when used in tandem with other forms of communication can be useful... and fun! However, it has to start somewhere.If you just scored someone's digits—whether it's platonic or romantic—our experts offer some tips to keep in mind when beginning a conversation through text. We also touch on what not to do when texting someone new, because we all know the unique frustration of an unanswered text, too. 

Don't Start a Text Conversation This Way

Most experts we talked to agree to avoid potentially heavy topics and to save them for the phone or an in-person conversation. According to Concepcion, stay away from "heavier topics about your relationship status, your past hurts, personal victories and disagreements or misunderstandings which can easily be taken out of context." Similarly, "When you are texting back and forth and think to yourself, 'Why are we not talking on the phone?' then this may be the time to ask if you can call," Ray says.Ray adds, "You also want to absolutely avoid statements that are sexually explicit in nature unless that is your only goal. Initial texting conversations should always be light-hearted, inspirational, inquisitive, and fun to create a friendly and engaging open dialogue." Other things to be mindful of when texting someone new? Your tone, use of emojis, and when the text conversation is over. Says Ray, "Some people like to text forever and you may not be in a space or time to do that. Always have a plan to politely end your communication."

Text Conversation Starters

As a rule of thumb, texting someone new means keeping things light and involves back-and-forth dialogue about shared interests, finding common ground, and learning about who they are, says Ray. "It takes some time getting to know someone's communication style and may be best to ask in the beginning, 'So are you a texter, or do you prefer to talk on the phone?' or 'Can you text at work, or when is the best time to text you?'" Relationship expert Robyn Koenig of Rare Find adds, "The key to conversation starters is to be interested in the other person without coming across as anxious or desperate for attention. Keep it light and show you have a genuine interest by reaching out with questions that allow for responses beyond one word." 

Below, use this list of 30 conversation starters to jump-start your next text thread with someone new:

01.What do you have planned this weekend?

This conversation starter serves two purposes: It allows you to get an idea of their interests while enabling you to suggest a rendez-vous if their schedule is open.

02.How would you describe yourself in three words?

Maximum insight in minimal characters.

03.How do you relieve stress?

Are they the type who never misses a day at the gym, or do they find zen through binge-watching TV? Either way, knowing how a person winds down is as important as understanding what keeps them going.

04.What's your sign?

True, this question can come across as a corny pick-up line, but knowing their zodiac sign can give you a glimpse into their personality. Plus, you can do some research into their sign's compatibility with your own.

05.Who have you been friends with the longest, and how did you meet?

If they're willing, this text conversation starter may encourage a dialogue about their childhood, including their family life, their hometown, and how they ended up where they are now.

06.What was your first concert?

They may be embarrassed to divulge their past musical interests, but that's part of the fun.

07.Did you see that viral YouTube video about [insert topic]? What did you think?

If you share a meme or video that made you crack up and they don't have a similar reaction, it could be a clue that you don't share the same sense of humor.

08.What did you want to be when you were younger?

If they were able to realize their dream, ask them more about who or what contributed to their success.

09.Who's your role model?

What qualities or achievements do they most admire in their role model? See if they think they share any of the same traits.

10.What's the high point of your day so far?

If they're having an all-around crummy day, reply with some funny gifs or a link to a silly Youtube video.

11.Working on anything exciting at the moment?

Don't limit this question to professional initiatives. It's possible that they're working on a creative project outside of work, like redecorating their bedroom or training their new dog.

12.What do you bring with you everywhere and anywhere you go?

Are they the sentimental type who always keeps a childhood memento in their pocket? Or are they more pragmatic, preferring to limit essentials to their phone and wallet? This conversation starter for texting might give you a peek into what they think is really important.

13.What's the most interesting thing you've read recently?

If they haven't read any good books lately, suggest some of your favorite authors.

14.What makes you nervous?

Spiders, public speaking, Zoom calls... Whatever their response, ask them to talk about their coping mechanisms for anxiety (or lack thereof). 

15.What's your pet peeve?

Are they irked by loud gum-chewers or bad email etiquette? It's always nice to commiserate about life's daily annoyances with someone who gets it.

16.Do you have any hidden talents?

You may not find out about their photography, singing, or poker skills unless you ask.

17.What else can you tell me about your post on [Instagram/Snapchat/Facebook/etc.]?

If you're connected with them on social media, as them to share more details about one of their more recent posts. For example, you could ask about a delicious-looking meal they posted, or ask where they were when they uploaded that sunset photo.

18.What's one thing you always do before bed?

Maybe they meditate, listen to a podcast, or pamper their skin. Follow up with more questions about their favorite daily rituals.

19.Were (or are) you a good student?

Don't neglect to ask about their favorite and least favorite subjects. This conversation starter for texting allows you to learn more about their work ethic and their interests in one fell swoop.

20.If you could outsource one thing in life, what would it be?

Is it cleaning, laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, or something else altogether? Ask how they would spend that extra time.

21.If you came with a warning label, what would it say?

There's likely to be a little truth to their reply, even if their response is in jest.

22.How did your [interview/meeting/workout class] go?

This text conversation starter shows that you were paying attention during a previous conversation, and allows you to share in their achievements or failures.

23.What's your favorite food?

Go back to basics with this text conversation starter. You could reply with your favorite restaurant for that food or cuisine, and invite them to join you for a low-key lunch or more intimate dinner.

24.Can you help me choose between [X] and [Y]?

Even if you don't really need their help to decide what to wear tomorrow or what to eat for dinner tonight, you're showing that you value their opinion.

25.What was your first impression of me?

As long as you're cool with the potential for a snarky response, this text conversation starter is always good for a laugh.

26.If you could travel anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?

Is it a place they've visited before, or is the destination on their travel bucket list?

27.What's an emoji that sums up your day so far?

Reply with a few questions about what happened to result in that smiley or sad face.

28.What's your favorite movie?

How many times have they seen it? Bonus points if they provide their favorite line from the flick.

29.What's your favorite place in your home?

Their answer may hint at their homebody tendencies, or let you know that they're more of an extrovert.

30.Hey! Let's get together—when are you free so we can meet up?

Skip the small talk and get right to the point with this text conversation starter. After all, even the most riveting text conversation can't compete with the connections that can made during an in-person hang-out.

Kelly Dawson

Cook a Steak at Home Like a Pro

 How Tony Tammero, corporate executive chef at The Palm, makes the perfect New York Strip in the comfort of his own kitchen.

In 1926, two Italian immigrants applied for a business license for a restaurant named after their hometown, Parma. The New York City official misunderstood their heavily accented English ("Palma, Palma"), and the Palm was born.Originally an Italian restaurant, the Palm evolved into a steak house when cartoonists from the nearby King Features news syndicate started asking for steaks. (When they couldn't pay their tabs, the artists gave birth to another Palm tradition—doodling caricatures of regulars on the walls as well as contributing their own work, like Popeye and Beetle Bailey.)Here, the Palm's corporate executive chef, Tony Tammero, who started at the Second Avenue restaurant in 1963, shares the secret of how he cooks steak at home with minimal smoke and maximum flavor. Hint: "The home broiler is definitely not a choice. It just poaches the steak and takes the blood right out of it, and you end up with gray meat," says Tammero.

What you need:

—2 matching aluminum skillets with stainless-steel interiors and metal handles. Tammero likes a basic Wearever skillet—not Teflon and not cast iron, as they "smoke too much."

—2 16-ounce USDA Prime New York strip steaks, 1 1/4 to 1 1/2 inches thick and aged 28 days. ("Tell the butcher you want 'em 'clean to the silver', meaning with a little fat on the edge. Then trim the excess fat," says Tammero.)

—1 tablespoon olive oil

—Fine sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

What to do:

Brush the steaks with olive oil and let stand at room temperature, uncovered, for 1 hour.

Place one of the skillets over high heat. Sprinkle one side of each steak with a little salt and pepper. Do not season the meat beforehand. ("Salt bleeds the meat," Tammero says.)

When the skillet gets hot (after about 3 minutes), place the steaks in it, seasoned side down. And here's the trick "that will save your marriage," Tammero says: Use the second skillet as a cover by turning it upside down and placing it atop the steak. This captures the smoke, keeping your house from smelling beefy for days.After 3 minutes, carry the skillets to the window or back door, remove the top skillet, and let the smoke out. Season the top side of each steak. Then, with a pair of tongs, turn the steaks over, cover, and return to the stove for 3 more minutes.Transfer the steaks to a rack set over a plate and let stand for at least 30 minutes. Thirty minutes before you plan to finish the steaks, preheat the oven to 425¯F.Return the steaks to the skillet in which they were seared and finish cooking in the oven for 8 minutes for a warm red center (medium rare) or 12 minutes for a pink center (medium). Let rest for 8 minutes.

Finally, the touch test:

Tammero warns against cutting into the meat to see if it's done. He prefers the touch test that he learned from the Palm's original chef: Let your left hand hang loose. With the index finger of your right hand, press down firmly on the area between your left thumb and forefinger to gauge the softness; that is how a blood-rare steak feels if you press it just as hard. Now make a loose fist with your left hand, and press the same area again. That's how a medium-rare steak feels to the touch. Make a tight fist, press again, and you will feel the spring-back of a well-done steak.

By team

32 (Almost Free) At-Home Date Ideas to Keep the Romance Alive

 Spending time with a significant other at home is intimate, especially without the intrusion of a waiter, friends, or the world at large. If you’re in a new relationship, this phase can be exhilarating as well as a bit intimidating. And if you’ve been around your plus-one for a while, then you already know how relaxing this chapter can be as well. We often think that dates need some sort of production quality to them and that such occasions have to take place beyond a home’s comfortable cocoon, but why not see how much fun you can have on an at-home date?We put together a list of 32 at-home date ideas—whether you have one hour, several, or the whole day to spare, you can make this intimate space a larger part of your romantic memories. 

01.Make a Really Good Cup of Coffee Together

What better way to start your day than with a little romance? Break out the Chemex (or the bougie tea selection) and put some true effort into that morning brew with your honey.

02.Enjoy a Phone-Free Meal

Leave your distracting phones in the other room or employ the help of accountability apps like Forest, and really connect. Whether you cook or order in, you'll enjoy deeper conversation without your phones constantly interrupting. You'll be amazed at where the conversation can go when you're both fully engaged in the dialogue. 

03.Have a Conversation That Isn’t About Work, Stress, or To-Do Lists

Get to know each other on a deeper level. Be intentional with your conversation and leave any superficial stressors at the door. For extra inspiration, try using couples' conversation cards to guide the discussion to all-new depths. 

04.Stay in Bed

Seriously, when was the last time you two let yourselves relax in bed before jumping up to get things done? Have a proper lay-in and really luxuriate in your time between the sheets. Elevate the experience by investing in plush bedding and scents that create the ambiance of your, well, dreams.

05.Put a Puzzle Together

You fit like two pieces of a puzzle, but let's see how you fare at putting one together. See if you can tackle 1,000 pieces in hour-long stretches. Or, if you have the time (and willpower), bang it all out in one day.

06.Enjoy Breakfast in Bed

We all have those days where we want to stay in bed all day long. Why not make a date out of it? Whip up breakfast together and bring your plates back to the bedroom and dine under the covers. Life-changing tip: Try dinner in bed, too.

07.Read Together

Curl up together and open those books you’ve been meaning to get to. Not all meaningful dates involve conversation, but you'll have plenty to talk about after your reads. You can even start a book club for just the two of you. Make a list of your all-time favorite books, pepper in some new releases, and carve out time to discuss. 

08.Set Up a Spa in the Living Room

Nothing beats a day of self-care. Play spa music, wear face masks, light candles, and whip up some infused water or pour Champagne to set the tone. You can purchase aromatic oils and give each other massages, or up the ante by hiring a masseuse to come to your home.

09.Take a Yoga Class

Stream YouTube in your living room (or backyard). Depending on your energy levels, choose from relaxing yin sessions or more active flows. End the practice with a meditation to set your intentions for the rest of the date. Pro tip: Pick up some cute activewear ahead of time. 

10.Go for a Run Around the Neighborhood

Okay, technically this isn’t entirely at home. But you can designate a “finish line” at your front steps and stretch in the living room after. We recommend creating a shared playlist to get you pumped as you hit the pavement.

11.Chat on Your Porch

If you're lucky enough to have a porch or deck, take advantage and get some fresh air with your date. If you live in a city, a stoop or rooftop will work, too! Grab some wine or snacks, and make a picnic out of it. You might be amazed at how much you notice about your neighborhood.

12.Watch a Comedy Special

Nothing is better than seeing your loved one laugh. Bonus: It can help mitigate any awkwardness if your relationship is still in the early stages. Netflix is an absolute gold mine for comedy specials—you might even gain a few inside jokes.

13.Perfect Your Cornhole Skills

Two people are all you need for a night of friendly competition. Practice makes perfect with a backyard set, but you can play indoors, too. Up the ante with a little wager like, "Winner gets to choose the takeout place for dinner." Keep things fun with wagers that add value and extend the date rather than appointing chores. ("Loser does laundry.")

14.Create the Perfect Playlist

Have a dance party in your living room. (Be sure to include one slow song!) Make it extra romantic by curating a playlist of significant songs throughout your relationship, and let all the feels take over.

15.Install Flower Boxes in the Windows

Not only is this date fun, but it's also functional. The best part? You get to watch the labors of your love grow in tandem with your relationship.

16.Have a Picnic

Spread out a blanket and serve the ultimate cheese board—it works even in your living room. Light candles to set the mood. If cheese doesn't get you going, substitute with your favorite takeout instead.

17.Build a Living-Room Fort

This is still fun, regardless of age, and can be the perfect comfy spot for a Netflix binge. Make sure to have snacks on hand. And tons of pillows and blankets for cuddling.

18.Dress Up for a Fancy Dinner

That just so happens to be waiting in your kitchen. Dressing the part for a special date night will not only make you feel more confident but further highlight the fact that this isn't just any regular dinner at home. If you cook it together ahead of time, you'll have even more time to bond.

19.Paint and Sip

Buy a couple of canvases and some paint, and then pop open your favorite bottle. Bonus points for crafting a fruit bowl as the painting subject, too. There are plenty of ways to make this date-night idea a little spicier, but we'll let your imagination take the wheel.

20.Set Up a Projector in the Backyard

Watch your favorite movie under the stars. Or play your wedding video or a montage of clips you've taken together. Combine with the aforementioned fort for even more fun.

21.Cook a Meal From One of Your Favorite Trips

Make homemade pasta based on a beloved vacation in Italy or tacos from a recent California getaway. It may not taste exact, but it'll bring all the happy memories back. Complete the scene by playing on-theme music and even dressing the part.

22.Create a Gallery Wall

Finally print out your favorite photos and arrange them with framed concert tickets, letters, and other mementos. It can serve as the ultimate scrapbook of your relationship, and you'll relive every moment together as you put them up.

23.Have a Movie Marathon

In lieu of the usual Netflix session, grab the remote and watch an entire movie series instead. Crank out Harry Potter, Star Wars, The Avengers, or Pirates of the Caribbean, just to name a few—nothing wrong with rewatching old favorites!

24.Learn a New Skill Together

Learn to play one song on a guitar, knit a square for a future scarf, perfect your knife skills, or even learn a fun magic trick. There are tons of virtual classes you can take together and have ongoing date nights for the duration of the course. Plus, you're guaranteed to get some laughs out of it.

25.Throw a Two-Person Party

String lights over the patio, crank music from the speakers, cook barbecue, and make yourselves a pitcher of sangria. Who says you need company to have this kind of fun?

26.Eat Pizza in Bed

Pizza is always a good idea; eating it in bed in your robes is even better. We'd recommend your favorite takeout pie for this one. Something about a greasy slice in bed just hits differently from an artisanal type.

27.Have a Game Night

Stay in your pajamas, pull out your favorite board game, prepare a snack platter (or order wings), and stash the devices far, far away. Not much of a gamer? Try some steamier alternatives like truth-or-dare cards or foreplay dice.

28.Take a Virtual Vacation

Nothing beats traveling with your partner, but if you're stuck in your hometown, you can still satisfy that wanderlust. Reminisce on vacations past or start planning your next trip. Life hack: Your brain produces the same mood-boosting chemicals when planning a trip as actually going on one.

29.Order In for Dinner

Give takeout an upgrade. Instead of the classic pizza or Chinese food delivery, opt for a high-class spread from an upscale restaurant. Order a few appetizers, entrees, and sides—and don't forget about dessert!

30.Recreate Your First Date

If you can't revisit the place where your romance began, you can replicate it! Did your first date happen over after-work drinks? When the clock strikes 5 p.m., get your S.O. in the kitchen and sip the same drinks you bonded over before. Or maybe you chatted over tacos and margaritas—put that on the menu!

31.Conduct a Beer or Wine Tasting

You don't need to visit a brewery to get your craft beer fix! Buy a few bottles of beer or wine and pour your own flights. You may just discover a new favorite brew from the comfort of your own home.

32.Subscribe to a Home-Date Service

Nowadays, there is a delivery service for practically everything—including date night! Enter DateBox Club, a monthly subscription service that delivers date-night materials to your doorstep. Who doesn't love an impromptu date?

Kelly Dawson

30 Interesting Things to Talk about with a Girl

 Are you having your first date with this cute girl soon? You are probably nervous, fearing she would find you boring or a big turn-off. To shake off this anxiety, you must be ready with a list of the things to talk about with a girl.If you are still clueless about what could engage you in an interactive conversation with her, you can check out this list:

Something Close to Her Heart

1. Family

Most girls would melt if you talked to them about their families. If your date is one of them, she will surely soften up if you ask about the family she grew up with.

2. Pets

Ask the girl if she likes animals. If yes, follow up with a question about her pets and insert how you would love to meet them. You can also share about your own pets.

3. Hobbies

It is safe to talk about favorite hobbies. Ask the girl what she loves to do during her free time. Who knows? You could share the same pastimes, and you might do them together in the future.

4. Friends

You can also ask about her friends’ favorite hangouts and leisure altogether. Based on her kind of friends, you can know more about her.

5. School/Work

Is she still studying or working? Talk to her about what she loves about school or her job. You can also share some glimpses about your own.

6. Hometown

If you are not from the same place, it is sensible to ask about her hometown. And while she talks, let her feel that you are excited to visit her place.

7. Childhood Memories

Another interesting topic would be your unforgettable childhood memories. You can talk about funny, embarrassing, or scary experiences.

8. Interests

You can also share your interests. Ask each other about your favorite activities or topics. This is an excellent way to get to know each other more.

9. Talents

Aside from interests, finding out about the girl’s talents will help you know her too. Is she good at singing, dancing, painting, or writing poems? Make sure to express your admiration for what she can do. It will make her feel good about herself.

Her Aspirations

10. Dream Career

If she is not established yet, you can ask her about her dream career. Your date would be delighted to share her dreams with you. So, why not talk about your career plans and why you like certain professions.

11. Ideal Guy

For sure you are interested in knowing this. So, gather your courage to casually ask her about the traits she likes in a man. You could be the one she is looking for!

12. Future Family

It would not hurt to ask about her dream family. How many kids does she want? Where does she like to live? Is she willing to be a full-time mom? Or does she want to be both a career woman and a doting wife and mother?

13. Short-term Goals

It is also wise to talk about goals, and you can start with short-term ones, such as her plans for the following months. You may also ask her about her yearly goals.

14. Long-term Goals

To sound more mature and serious in getting to know her, ask about her long-term goals. Aside from her dream career, what else does she want to accomplish for herself? Does she want to migrate abroad or buy herself a property in your current city? Is she planning to establish a business or get the CEO position at her current company?

15. Investments

If you think she is a practical girl, she would surely love talking about investments. Does she like investing in new businesses, or does she want to play it safe by investing in established companies? When you open up about this topic, just make sure you do not sound like an opportunist who is after wealthy women.

Common Interests

16. Current Events

You can open up about current events if you want more random topics. If she seems interested in talking about the economy, the government, or wars happening abroad, you have many topics to choose from.

17. Politics

If you open up about politics, make sure to keep it subtle unless you share the same point of view. Do not debate, or you might lose this chance at love for good.

18. Movies

Does she love films? If yes, try asking her about her favorite movies. Good thing if you share the same taste in film genres, so you can suggest other movies she might love.

19. TV Series

You can also open up about the newest drama series craze. If she gets excited because she watches it or wants to watch it, keep the conversation more exciting by suggesting you watch it together sometime.

20. Music

How about her favorite songs? What kind of music does she listen to? Does she love pop, country, or classic songs? Everyone loves music, so this topic is one of the easiest ways to hook her in a conversation.

21. Food

Who can resist mouth-watering food? Most girls, despite the diet trends, love to eat. So, if you want to win her over, you can ask her about her favorite desserts, snacks, or cuisines. Tell her that you would love to have them on your next date.

22. Celebrities

Is she interested in entertainment buzz? Who are her favorite Hollywood actors? What can she say about the Johnny Depp-Amber Heard issue? What can she say about Will Smith being banned from the Oscars for ten years?

23. Fashion

Can you tell if she loves fashion? If yes, and you have some ideas about the style trends, you can start a conversation about that. You can ask if she is into designer bags, shoes, and clothes.

24. Travels

You can also ask her if she loves to travel. How many countries has she been into? Does she love going to the beach or trekking up to the mountains?

25. Books

Is she a book lover? Find out about her favorite books and authors. You can also ask her to suggest some great reads.

26. Sports

Surely, you would be more comfortable talking about sports. Who knows? She could love them too! Try to open up about the topic and see if she seems interested. If yes, talk about the games she likes and the teams she roots for.

More Personal

27. Faith

If you are already comfortable talking about more personal stuff, you can try opening up about faith. For example, does she believe in God? What church does she go to?

28. Painful Experiences

If she starts giving hints about her painful past, assure her that she can talk to you about it if she wishes to. Be a good listener as she recalls her heartbreaks and compliment how strong she is.

29. Biggest Lesson Learned

This may sound a cliché, but most girls would love to answer your “What is your biggest lesson in life?” question. She would love to share with you her nuggets of wisdom.

30. Inspirations

You can also ask about her motivations for working hard. This topic can also lead you to deeper conversations, which can help you know each other more.

From the Heart

Whatever topics you talk about, make her feel that you are interested in listening to her. If she is as delighted as you to go on this date, any topic will be interesting. What matters the most is how sincere you will be with each other.

Cyril Abello

Not All Dietary Fibers Are Equal: Here's Why

 Experts say most people in the United States don’t have enough fiber in their diet.

    They add that the benefits of fiber can be different from person to person.

    They also note that fiber’s benefits can differ from food to food.

    They recommend people get their fiber from food instead of supplements.

The health benefits of fiber can vary between different people and different food.

That’s according to a new studyTrusted Source in which researchers found that the benefits of fiber can depend on the type of fiber, the amount of fiber, and the individual consuming the fiber.

“Our results demonstrate that the physiological, microbial, and molecular effects of individual fibers differ substantially,” Michael Snyder, PhD, senior author of the study and a geneticist at Stanford School of Medicine in California, said in a press release.

Fibers can vary based on length, solubility, and other factors. Snyder argues understanding how different people react to the same kind of fiber is important.

“There is a need for determining the unadulterated effects of individual fibers on the microbiome and for establishing associated health biomarkers, ideally by testing different fibers on the same individuals,” he said.

“Our results demonstrate the tantalizing prospect of using targeted fibers, mediated by the microbiome, to drive health and systems biology in a predictable, personalized direction,” he added.

Details of the study

In undertaking the research, Snyder and his colleagues investigated the effect of two common forms of soluble fiber supplements.

Arabinoxylan is a fiber commonly found in whole grains. Long-chain inulin is a fiber found in chicory root and onions.

The researchers enlisted 18 people to participate in the study. They were given 10 grams of fiber every day in the first week of the study, 20 grams every day in the second week, and 30 grams every day in the third week.

The researchers found that on average, participants who took arabinoxylan had a noticeable reduction in LDL cholesterol levels due to an increase in bile acid production.

Those who took low doses of long-chain inulin on average saw a slight decrease in inflammatory markers as well as an increase in certain kinds of gut microbes that are thought to be beneficial. Higher doses of long-change inulin were associated with increased inflammation and higher liver enzymes, which can be harmful.

For arabinoxylan, despite the fact all participants took the same dosage of the fiber, the researchers reported that individual responses to supplementation varied, with some people not experiencing any changes in cholesterol.

Reaction to the study

Dana Hunnes, Ph.D., MPH, RD, a senior dietician at the University of California Los Angeles and author of the book “Recipe for Survival,” says the findings of the study aren’t surprising.

“Nutrition and how we respond to various doses of certain nutrients is not one-size-fits-all. We all have different metabolisms, different microbiomes, even different needs depending on our body habitus (size/muscle/fat, etc). So, it is not surprising to me that different people would react differently to a variety of fibers and their doses,” Hunnes told Healthline.

“For people whose cholesterol is primarily affected by diet, this added fiber would likely have an effect. For those where their high cholesterol levels are more familial-based/inherited, it would seem more likely to have less of an effect,” she added.

How much fiber is enough?

The American Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics advises that the ideal intake of fiber is 14 grams for every 1,000 calories consumed.

For men, this is roughly 38 grams and for women 25 grams.

Lauri Wright, Ph.D., RDN, LDN, the chair of the Department of Nutrition & Dietetics at the University of North Florida, says while there are many advantages to consuming fiber, most people in the United States aren’t getting enough.

“There are many benefits of fiber. Soluble fiber, found in foods such as oats, beans, and fruits, helps lower blood cholesterol and glucose levels. Insoluble fiber, found in foods such as whole wheat grains and vegetables, aids in digestion. Both types of fiber are natural appetite suppressants,” Wright told Healthline.

“On average, Americans only consume about 15 grams a day,” she noted.

Where to get your fiber

When it comes to getting enough fiber, both Wright and Hunnes say it’s best to look first at food sources before using fiber supplements.

“In general, I recommend people get their fiber from foods and not from supplements, as there are so many additional benefits – health and environmental – from eating a wide variety of high-fiber foods,” Hunnes said.

Wright says some easy ways to increase fiber intake are to switch to whole grain, add beans to soups or salads, eat cereals with five or more grams of fiber per serving, and snack on high fiber foods such as popcorn, hummus, and carrots.

“Food sources are the best source because you not only get the fiber but also the taste and additional nutrients found in these healthful foods,” she said.

Written by Elizabeth Pratt

Fact checked by Jill Seladi-Schulman, Ph.D.

21 Suggestive Signs She is Developing Feelings

 How will you know if someone is developing feelings? Are you hopeful that your crush is finally noticing you? Certainly, that would be exciting news! No wonder you are here, wanting to find out if what you are thinking about the girl you like is true.If you want to know the signs she is developing feelings for you, continue to read below. Evaluate how she behaves around you.

Happy When You’re Around

1. Her Eyes Brighten Upon Seeing You.

One of the obvious signs that a girl is starting to like someone is the sudden change in her mood whenever that person arrives. Of course, we believe that the eyes are windows to our souls, so they can reveal much about one’s feelings. Therefore, if you notice how her eyes seem to smile and brighten whenever you are around, you probably have a chance with her.

2. She Becomes More Cheerful.

It is not just her eyes that liven up when she sees you, but her whole being as well. She becomes more energetic and jollier. It is not just about trying to look positive because someone she likes is around. It is normal for a person to be genuinely happy whenever they get to see and spend time with their special someone.

3. Her Friends Playfully Tease Her.

Do her friends seem to tease her always about something weird whenever you arrive? And how does she respond? Does she seem to enjoy it? It could be about you! It is either they are aware you like her or she is already developing feelings for you.

4. The Smile on Her Face Does Not Wear Off.

Another sign that a girl is starting to like you is her unfading smile whenever you are around. Does she excitedly greet and smile at you upon meeting? If that smile on her face stays throughout the time you are together, believe me, she is falling for you.

Awkward Near You

5. She Cannot Look You Straight in the Eyes.

While maintaining eye contact is for the bold, girls who are only starting to develop feelings for someone are less confident. One sign that she is beginning to like you is her hesitation to look you in the eyes. It is like she feels that her eyes would betray her feelings.

6. She Seems Nervous.

If she always seems nervous or conscious whenever you are around, you should ask why. What could be the reason why she is uneasy with you? It is possible that your presence makes her heart beat faster.

7. Her Voice is High-Pitched.

Another sign that she feels awkward when you are around is how her voice seems to be unnaturally high-pitched. While some girls may intentionally soften their voice to sound sweet and more feminine, some are simply too nervous that they are close to squeaking.

8. She Blushes Whenever You Greet Her.

Do you greet her whenever you cross paths? What is her usual reaction? Does she seem to blush red? If yes, she is obviously falling—or has fallen—for you.

9. She Immediately Looks Away Whenever Your Eyes Meet.

And what happens whenever you accidentally meet her gaze? Does she immediately avert her eyes and pretend she did not see you? Oh, that is an obvious indication that she feels something warm inside. How about you? How do you react whenever this happens?

10. She Stammers When Talking to You.

If she unusually stammers whenever the two of you talk, consider it as a sign too. Her stutters are a sign that you make her feel nervous. What do you think is the best explanation for this?

Vulnerable with You

11. She Tells You Her Secrets.

Does this girl make you her constant confidante? Is she fond of sharing with you her inner thoughts and secrets? If she is willing to disclose very personal information to you, it is a sign that she wants you to be part of her more intimate world.

12. When She is Not Okay, She Asks for Your Company.

The person who likes you would want you to be her home. Thus, one sign that she is developing feelings for you is her emotional dependence on you.  She probably thinks of your presence as her comfort zone, so she often asks if she can see you if she is troubled.

13. She Shares About Her Past Heartaches.

Aside from her secrets, is this girl open about her past with you? Has she voluntarily told you about her previous relationships and how she got heartbroken? Girls are vulnerable with the guys they like, so they readily open up about their fears. It is like they are indirectly asking these guys not to hurt them like how the others did.

14. She Cries Infront of You.

Have you ever seen this girl cry in front of you? This is another indication that she lets her walls down whenever with you. Most girls wish they could have a prince charming who would save them from their distress. And her crying before you is like hoping you can be that savior.

15. She Totally Trusts You.

Does she talk about how she thinks you are trustworthy? If a girl chooses to trust you, it means she is willing to be vulnerable with you. The only possible reason here is her desire to surrender her heart to you. She would not trust you if she has no intention of becoming part of your life.

Crazy about You

16. You Got Your No. 1 Fan in Her.

Is this girl a constant supporter? Does she often encourage you to reach for your dreams because she believes in your capabilities? Does she call herself your no. 1 fan or cheerleader? The reason why she wants you to acknowledge her support is her hope that you will realize how much she cares about you.

17. She Actively Follows You on Social Media.

If she does not miss reacting and commenting on your posts on social media, you can tell that she is fond of you. It is one of the most obvious signs that she is into you.

18. She Makes Ways to Get You Solo.

Does she often find ways to draw you to her side? Is she making excuses so you and her can go somewhere away from the crowd? If she wants to be alone with you most of the time, it is clear that she wants your attention to herself. That means she is in love.

19. She Will Leave Everything Just to See You.

Anyone can definitely say she is already in love with you if she can leave anything she is doing just to be with you. Whenever you call or ask for help from her, she would never say “no”. She will always be available for you.

20. She Cannot Resist Touching You.

Is she fond of touching your arm or hand? Or does she like pinching your cheeks or nose? Unless she does this to everyone, it is obvious that she is developing feelings for you. She simply cannot get enough of you.

21. She Messages You Every Now and Then.

Another clear indication that she is falling for you is her constant texts, calls, or chats. If she always initiates conversation—even without any important topic—you can say that she likes you. She probably misses you whenever you are not together, that is why she cannot resist contacting you.

Just Take It Slow

If through these signs you have concluded that your crush is developing feelings for you already, you should think of what is next. Just because you feel the same way about each other does not mean you can automatically date and have a happy ending.

To find out if it can work between the two of you, seek to know each other better first. Be good friends and find out if your values, principles, and priorities match or complement. Do not rush into love.

Cyril Abello

Everything You Need to Know About Ikigai, The New Hygge

 Meet the next "life philosophy" trend sweeping the globe.

Humans have been around for hundreds of thousands of years, and yet we still haven't answered one of the most crucial questions of existence: how do we make the most of our brief time on this great planet?One thing that everyone seems to be able to agree upon is the necessity of having a good work/life balance. Since Americans, to say the least, aren't the best at achieving this kind of equilibrium, it's become fashionable to look to other cultures for inspiration. Last year, it was all about hygge (pronounced hoo-gah), a Danish term that the Oxford Dictionary describes as "a quality of cosiness and comfortable conviviality that engenders a feeling of contentment or well-being."At its most basic, this Scandinavian import encourages you to maximize your existential happiness by taking pleasure in small, cozy pleasures: drinking a cup of freshly brewed coffee, wearing cashmere socks on a cold day, drinking mulled wine by the fireplace while watching the snow fall outside your window, etc.As nice as it sounds, and popular as it was, a lot of people who actually tried the hygge approach complained that it drove them crazy, as they stressed out about whether or not they had put out the candles they lit in their bedroom and whether or not the trend's emphasis on eating baked goods was making them fat, a move that is decidedly un-hygge. Not to mention that while being cozy is easy enough in the fall and winter, it's not quite as easy to attain in the swelter of summer, and a life philosophy that only works 6 months a year is not ideal.Perhaps that's why this fall's newest trend for living your best life is ikigai (pronounce ick-ee-guy): a Japanese life philosophy that means "reason for being" (somewhat like the French raison d'etre). If you haven't heard about it yet, don't worry. We've gathered everything you need to know about it right here. 

1.It's super ancient.

In Japanese culture, every person has their own special ikigai, but it takes some soul-searching to figure out what it is. Practically speaking, ikigai is defined as the one true thing in your life that makes it worth living. It's a passion or activity, and the way to live ikigai to the fullest is to indulge in that one thing as much possible. (So if your ikigai is fishing, then fish as much as you can. If it's walking your dog, then do that as much as you can. If it's building complicated computer software, then do that.)The term itself comes from the compound of two terms: iki, meaning life, and gai, meaning worth, and dates all the way back to the Heian period (794 to 1185). In a 2001 research paper on ikigai, co-author Akihiro Hasegawa, said that "Gai comes from the word kai ("shell" in Japanese) which were deemed highly valuable, and from there ikigai derived as a word that means "value in living."

2.It will make you much healthier.

In a 2013 TED talk, author Dan Buettner credited ikigai with the reason that Japanese people live as long as they do. Buettner traveled the world in order to study communities in which people live the longest–areas which he refers to as "blue zones"–and revealed their secrets in his resulting book, Blue Zones: Lessons on Living Longer from the People Who've Lived the Longest. In the talk, Buettner described Okinawa, a remote Japanese island in the East China sea, as "ground zero for longevity" because of the anomalous number of people there who live to be 100.While a lot of Japanese' longevity can be attributed to a plant-based diet and a respect for the elderly, Buettner also puts a lot of weight on the fact that the Okinawans don't even have a word for "retirement." Instead, they have ikigai, which he describes as "the reason to get up in the morning."For one of the residents, a mixed martial artist, his ikigai was doing karate. For a 102-year-old woman, it was holding her great-great-great granddaughter in her arms. Buettner explained that, when asked, "What is your ikigai?" every resident there immediately knew the answer.

3.How to Find Your Own Ikigai

Luckily, it doesn't require you to spend a month searching your soul in a Tibetan monastery (though that certainly wouldn't hurt!). Instead, Buettner simply suggests making three lists: one that details your values, another which identifies the things you're good at, and another that describes what you like to do. The overlapping quality in all of those lists is your ikigai.For me, my ikigai is definitely writing, and certainly it would seem like the key to living an ikigai-filled life is working a job that you're passionate about, as opposed to something that brings you a lot of money and power. And yet, in a 2010 survey of 2,000 Japanese men and women, only 31% of people named their job as their ikigai.So, if you don't think your job is your ikigai but don't want to drop it either, don't fret! Maybe traveling with the money you make from it is your ikigai. Or maybe it's coming home to your wife and kids and eating dinner with them after a long day.And if you make the three lists and don't find one overlapping quality, that just means you need to try some new things. Maybe yoga will be your ikigai. Or deep-sea diving. Or drinking fine wine. Or, maybe, just maybe, something hygge.

Diana Bruk

How To Improve Your Digestive System Naturally

 Most people will occasionally have unsettling digestive symptoms such as diarrhoea, gas, heartburn, sickness or even constipation. If people persist in getting these symptoms it can have a serious effect on your day to day living. Due to digestive symptoms being able to be treated naturally we will give you some helpful tips on how to improve your digestive system naturally. Diet and lifestyle changes can make a huge difference to your lifestyle so let’s get to it. 

Eat Real Food

Due to a western diet compiling of refined carbs, saturated fats and additives, people are increasingly getting digestive disorders. This is due to additives contributing to gut inflammation which can then lead to an illness called leaky gut. Trans fats make up a lot of processed food and are known to harm your heart and increase the risk of IBS. You can reduce these symptoms and illnesses by eating more whole foods and limiting the amount of unhealthy processed food that you consume. 

Get Plenty Of Fibre In Your Diet

Fibre is fantastic for your digestion system. There are two kinds, the first is soluble fibre which absorbs water and bulks up your stool whilst insoluble fibre helps to keep things moving and cleans your insides. A high fibre diet can help to reduce the risk of illnesses such as haemorrhoids and ulcers. If you are struggling to improve your diet then you can look at adding probiotic supplements to your lifestyle. 

Food High In Fibre:

    Pears

    Strawberries

    Avocado

    Raspberries

    Lentils

Add Healthy Fats To Your Diet

There is no point in saying that you will cut out all fats from your diet as this will not work. Instead, only consume healthy fats as these will help you to feel full after meals as well as it helps nutrient absorption so you need some sort of fat within your diet. Omega 3 is a healthy fatty acid that helps to reduce the risk of inflammatory bowel diseases. Some foods that are high in omega 3 include salmon, nuts, chia seed and sardines to name a few.  

Foods High In Healthy Fats:

    Avocado

    Eggs

    Dark chocolate 

    Nuts

    Chia Seeds

Stay Hydrated

Constipation results from low fluid intake. It is recommended that one should consume at least 1.5 – 2 litres of fluids a day that isn’t caffeinated to prevent this from happening. However, this can vary greatly depending on where you live. If you live in a warmer country, then you should obviously increase your fluid levels due to one perspiring more. In addition to water, you can opt for other non-caffeinated liquids such as herbal teas, seltzer water or cordials etc. Other ways you can improve your liquid levels can be by eating more fruits and vegetables that are high in water such as cucumber, courgette, melons and strawberries.

Eat Mindfully

If you are watching TV whilst you are eating, you will find that your food is just gone in seconds. This is because you’re not concentrating on what you are eating. Being mindful when you eat can seriously improve your digestive system. Eating too much fast can result in bloating, gas and indigestion. 

How To Be More Mindful When Eating?

    Eat Slow

    Turn Everything Off Wehn Eating

    Sit At A Table

    Concentrate on Tastes and Smells

    Select Bite Consciously 

    Pay Attention To How You Eat.

Chew Your Food

If you want to help your digestive system, eat slower by chewing more. The digestive process starts with your mouth, your teeth break food down so enzymes can break down the food further. If you don’t chew your food properly, it can lead to decreased nutrient absorption which makes eating pretty pointless.

If you think of it this way, the more you chew, the less work your stomach has to do to make it into a liquid for your intestine. It also produces saliva and the longer you chew, the more saliva you produce which then helps to break down carbs and fats in your meal. By chewing more and slowing down, you will notice a huge difference after each meal, you will feel less bloated and you will be fuller quicker.  

Get Moving 

Regular exercise has many benefits to the body and can help with your digestion. Exercise and gravity help to bring your food down and pass through easily so it might be worth going for a short walk after dinner so you can help the process move along. A study shows that regular exercise can help to increase your gut transit by up to 30% whilst another study suggests that someone with constipation can relieve their symptoms by going for a short run or walk. 

Not every ailment needs a doctor or prescription medication to relieve your digestion, there are many natural ways in which you can relieve symptoms and improve your health dramatically.

Daisy M