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Sunday, 6 February 2022

New Survey Reveals What Women Want in a Short-Term Partner

 Looking for a fling? A recent survey says this is what women want.

Recent research has shown that what women want in a short-term partner and a long-term partner often differ. One 2018 study in the journal Psychological Science found that when it came to casual encounters, women were more likely to choose men with "masculine" facial features, which are indicators of high levels of testosterone. Similarly, the research showed that women prefer more "feminine" facial features when choosing a husband, as they connote positive character traits like trustworthiness, sensitivity, and reliability. Now, a new study conducted by the female health app Clue sheds further insight into what women want exactly when it comes to casual sex partners. The survey used data from 68,000 users of the app, and it turns out, the following six traits are key.

1. You need to be taller than her.

Sadly, height bias is still very much real: 89. 5 percent of respondents said their short-term partner had to be taller than them, and only 11.9 percent viewed height as unimportant.The good news is that "taller" might not mean as tall as you might think, given that the average adult American woman is only 5'3". A 2018 survey by the dating website E-Harmony found that 5'8" was considered to be the ideal height for men, which is actually slightly shorter than the 5'9" that has been deemed the average height of an adult American man.

2. But you don't necessarily need to be smarter.

While having similar education levels may be important for women seeking a lifelong mate, only 46.7 percent of American women thought intelligence was an important trait in a casual partner.

3. Hair is great, but only if it's on your face.

While bearded men are still beloved around the world, most women said they'd prefer a short haircut and a hairless chest for a fling than luscious locks and a virtual forest of upper body hair.

4. You don't have to be buff.

Unsurprisingly, about half (51.8 percent) of all women surveyed considered body type to be a very important factor when deciding on a partner for a casual encounter. But if you don't have a six-pack or bulging biceps, don't fret. Fit, athletic physiques were found to be the most popular among women (50.3 percent), followed by "average" body types (29.1 percent). Only 7.8 percent said they wanted someone who was very muscular.

5. Your ethnicity and religion don't matter.

In what one might be tempted to consider a sign of progress, only 9.9 percent of women believed finding a partner with the same ethnicity was important for a fling, and only 11.6 percent thought you needed to have the same faith. This aligns with a recent survey from The Wall Street Journal and NBC News, which found that millennials care less about religion than previous generations.

6. And don't forget to smile!

Having an attractive smile was one of the most important factors for women from almost every country in the Clue survey. So, when you're on your date, remember to show that you're enjoying yourself by flashing those pearly whites!

Diana Bruk

Thursday, 3 February 2022

Drinking This Before Bed May Help You Sleep

 This type of juice may work as a natural sleep aid, experts say.

One of the most important ways to ensure you have a great day is to get a good night's rest. Yet one third of Americans report they get less than the recommended amount of sleep, says the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). This can not only leave you feeling groggy—which leads to a higher incidence of accidents and motor vehicle crashes— but can also cause serious health issues down the line, including an increased likelihood of heart disease, obesity, depression, and diabetes. "Getting enough sleep is not a luxury—it is something people need for good health," the CDC warns.However, for those struggling with poor sleep, practical solutions can be elusive. Now, experts are sharing important tips for improving sleep patterns, including one that takes just a moment of your time. They say you may be able to extend your sleep by over an hour by simply drinking a glass of this before bed. Read on to find out which beverage may work as a natural sleep aid, and the other health benefits it provides!

Drinking tart cherry juice before bed may help you sleep.

While you may intuitively reach for a warm glass of milk or some hot tea before bed, experts from the Cleveland Clinic say there's another beverage that may help you sleep: tart cherry juice made from Montmorency cherries. "Studies show that tart cherry consumption can help you sleep for up to 85 minutes longer because they're a source of melatonin, a sleep aid that reduces inflammation in the body," says the Cleveland Clinic site. Additionally, tart cherries contain tryptophan, an amino acid which helps the body produce serotonin and melatonin."Because tart cherries have different enzymes in them, they actually keep the tryptophan in the body longer," dietitian Beth Czerwony, RD, explains via the clinic's site. "So not only does it get you to sleep sooner, but it keeps you asleep for longer," she adds.

Here's what to do.

Experts say that to get the most out of your natural sleep aid, you should try drinking the juice about an hour before your intended bed time. Roughly four ounces of tart cherry juice or a half cup of fruit may be enough to have an effect. "You need to experiment with it yourself," says Czerwony. "Try a small amount for a few nights and see how you respond and then you can increase a little each night."If you opt for juice rather than the fruit itself or a supplement, make you choose one that contains no added sugar, which could have a negative affect on your sleep and overall health.

Tart cherries also have a range of other health benefits, studies say.

A 2018 review of studies published in the journal Nutrients found that in addition to promoting good sleep, there are many other reasons that tart cherry juice is considered good for the body. After analyzing 29 studies on the health benefits of cherries, the research team saw good reason to recommend the fruit as part of a balanced diet."Consumption of cherries decreased markers for oxidative stress in 8/10 studies; inflammation in 11/16; exercise-induced muscle soreness and loss of strength in 8/9; blood pressure in 5/7; arthritis in 5/5, and improved sleep in 4/4," the study authors write. "These results suggest that consumption of sweet or tart cherries can promote health by preventing or decreasing oxidative stress and inflammation," they explain. They're also packed with vitamin A, vitamin C, and magnesium.

Try these other sleep tips, too.

Though tart cherry juice may help you fall and stay sleep, experts say that it should be used as just one of several tactics to get a good night's rest. The Cleveland Clinic recommends establishing a relaxing bedtime routine, which may include going to bed at the same time every night, reading a book, taking a bath, meditating, and stretching. They note that turning off technology long before bedtime may help you wind down for the evening. "Give your phone a bedtime before your own," psychologist Susan Albers, PsyD, told the health authority.The CDC adds that you should also make sure your your bedroom is conducive to good sleep: it should be "quiet, dark, relaxing, and at a comfortable temperature." They further advise that you should "avoid large meals, caffeine, and alcohol before bedtime."What you do during the day matters, too. The Clinic suggests waking up and eating breakfast at the same time each day to set your circadian rhythm. Getting regular exercise can also help your body release endorphins and lower your cortisol levels, which may help with sleep.Finally, talk with your doctor if you are concerned about your sleep patterns, or if they are negatively affecting your quality of life. While poor sleep may be common, the consequences are no less detrimental to your health.

Lauren Gray 

The Hidden Power of Every Single Person Around You

 Other people’s thoughts and behaviors influence you. The people with whom you surround yourself affect your potential. This isn’t just speculation.A person’s economic mobility is largely determined by the county they live in.[1] Children from low income communities are less likely to have high earning potential than their affluent peers. It’s hard to break out of your surroundings.Groups of friends may subconsciously pick up one another’s behaviors and living style. They use similar phrases when they speak, and they may influence each other’s clothing choices.The effect of peer groups has not gone unnoticed in the corporate world as Jim Rohn quote,

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

When we surround ourselves with strong, high-achievers with good character, we are more likely to become just like them. On the other hand, imagine how much of a negative influence low-achievers can have on you. If your five best friends have a poor outlook on life and are satisfied with sub-par performance, then there’s a good chance that some of that negativity will rub off on you.

Others’ Influence Is Easily Overlooked

In order to improve your life, associate with people with higher standards than you. If you have high expectations for yourself and you surround yourself with people who also have bold expectations, you’ll have a greater quality of life. Everything that you allow into your life and every action you take reflects who you are. Tony Robbins once said,

“Let your grind be a reflection of the standards that you have set for yourself.”

This doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to have the fanciest things or work in the corner office right away, but it does mean that you do the best with whatever means you have. You don’t have to be top dog at the company to do excellent work. You don’t have to be wealthy to keep things organized. Going above and beyond will take you to the next level of success.If you feel like you’re stagnating in your current situation, it might be time to make some changes. Change and growth can arise when you make conscious choices about your environment.Beyond aspiring to improve your environment, keeping better company can go a long way toward helping you reach your goals. You can’t go through your life without people, and the types of people with whom you associate can impact your work.For example, if your friends tend to waste lots of time on their phones and social media, you might be drawn into that cycle of distraction. If you’re health-conscious, but your peers spend all day munching on cookies and chips, you’ll have a hard time sticking to a nutritious diet.On the other hand, when you’re surrounded by people who are focused when they’re working, you are more likely to be focused. In fact, it’s hard not to be focused because you want to be included and you don’t want to be responsible for breaking someone’s concentration. If you’ve never felt this type of motivation, step into a university library around finals. Everyone is united in their drive to succeed. 

Your Network Is Your Net Worth

It’s a quote from Tim Sanders, the former director of Yahoo!When you surround yourself with people who hold high standard to you, you are surrounded by people who strive to do better. Their energy is contagious and will positively influence you.

Motivation and dedication are contagious.

Imagine working on a team in which 80% of team members are highly motivated and 20% of them slack off. The slackers are in the minority, and they are surrounded by the high achievers.For the 20%, there are only two options for them. They can’t continue to put out mediocre work because the 80% will not accept it. They will either be influenced to do better work, or they will quit because they are unwilling to keep up. In the end, 100% of the remaining workers will be highly motivated.If we switched the percentages of high achievers and unmotivated workers, there would be a different outcome. If 80% of workers have a low level of motivation and 20% are highly motivated, the team’s outputs will be low quality. The high achievers will either lower their own standards, or they will become fed up with their team members’ lackadaisical approach. In the end, all remaining team members will exhibit uninspired work performance.

You’ll do more than you thought you could do.

When you are surrounded by people with low standards, you may feel like you don’t have to put in extra work. You may perceive yourself as good enough because you aren’t comparing your work with people aiming for continuous improvement.This means that even though you may be doing better than the average person in your peer group, you haven’t even scratched the surface of your full potential. Highly motivated people are constantly striving for improvement, and when you spend time with them, you recognize that you have plenty of growing to do too. You’ll make more breakthroughs than you thought possible because you are pushing yourself.For example, I studied Spanish when I was in college. Most people who were taking the Spanish didn’t care too much about it. When we had to review our translations in class, I was always stuck with a low-achiever. There seemed to be no upside to me putting in extra work since I wasn’t able to learn from my partner. I did well enough to get good grades, but I wasn’t progressing as much as I could have.My professor was a great teacher, and he noticed that I didn’t seem to be getting much out of group work with my current partner. He paired me with the top student in the class. Suddenly, both of us started doing better work because we were 100% invested in our studies. Her high standards pushed me to work harder and think more deeply. My willingness to learn helped her sharpen her skills by discussing the work with me.

When you control your environment, you control your life.

A fulfilling life doesn’t just come about through a stroke of good luck. If that were true, then people who win the lottery would be guaranteed happiness. In fact, most people who hit the jackpot end up miserable because even though they acquired a windfall of cash, they could not control the people and circumstances around them.The habits that you commit to every day can have a greater positive impact on your life than getting a large sum of money. When you surround yourself with people who help you grow, you’ll make greater gains. Peers who enrich your life with their presence and actions can help you reach your goals.One of my friends is a talented artist. He can take what other people would consider to be junk and turn it into fantastic sculptures. He came from a family that did not support his talent. He wanted for nothing in terms of food, clothing, and shelter, but he was completely miserable.My friend almost gave up on his dream until he met other artists in college. He was surrounded by professors and students who believed in the transformative power of art. He began practicing his craft every day, and today he makes his living off his work.For my friend, his family life was toxic. Even though he had all of his needs met, he didn’t flourish until he was surrounded by people who had high expectations of him. 

Find Friends Who Strive for Excellence

If you feel that you’re stuck, seek out people who have high expectations. Take notice of the coworker that is only satisfied with turning in the best work, and the friend who seems to have a clear direction in his or her life.Connect with people that have rigorous standards for themselves and others. Talk to them to figure out how they reached their level of success. Perhaps they have a philosophy or mindset that you could adopt to improve yourself.When you talk to these people, try to learn their perspectives about work, relationships, and life. Analyze why they think the way that they think. As your relationship develops, you can share your perspectives and seek feedback from them.As you discuss life and work with them, think about what aspects of their approach you would like to incorporate into your life. If some mindset or action has propelled them to be successful, try to emulate that. Mimicking positive behaviors can change your attitude. This is just like forcing yourself to smile to induce happiness or striking a power pose to improve your confidence.This is not the same as blindly copying whatever someone else does to be successful. This is about thoughtfully analyzing the successes of others and finding what works for you.

Every Relationship Should Push You to Be the Best Version of Yourself

It’s important to keep high standards in all aspects of your life. Look for coworkers, friends and even a romantic partner that bring out the best in you.By removing the toxicity from your life and seeking people that will accept nothing less than excellence from you, you set yourself up to achieve your dreams. 

Anna Chui

Tuesday, 1 February 2022

Simple Ways To Maintain Good Health

 Keeping healthy during our life is very important and we are told to exercise and eat well by health experts a lot. It can be very difficult to keep a healthy lifestyle if you are busy but it still can be done. Here are some tips that will help you keep living a healthy lifestyle!

Eat Healthily

Nutrition is a key factor for remaining healthy as this is key for how well our body functions. If you manage to be healthy through the week this means you can treat yourself at the weekend. Treating yourself now and again is what the weekend is for!Eating healthy and nutritious foods allows you to be less restrictive when it comes to your favourite foods. However, it is always important to make sure you consume a wide range of foods because our bodies must get all the vitamins and minerals that our body needs to function.There are many different diets out there such as; vegetarian, vegan, pescatarian and many others. These diets can lack a certain vitamin or mineral that we need. For example, if someone lives in a country that doesn’t have much sunlight and is on a vegan diet, then they may require vitamin D tablets. The most important thing is to eat a varied diet with plenty of healthy foods!

Drink Plenty of Water

Hydration is important for our bodies and health. Dehydration makes us feel sleepy and can lead to many different health issues. These could be headaches, dizziness, yellow and smelly urine, dry mouth, just to name a few. Staying hydrated will help to keep you in a good mood as well!It is very easy to keep hydrated by drinking all sorts of liquid. Some drinks are a lot better than others. For example, fizzy drinks such as Coca Cola and Fanta can damage your teeth and lead to them rotting. A fizzy drink is ok to have now and again but too many can damage your health. Another thing to mention with fizzy drinks is they can lead to other health issues as well, such as putting on weight. The best thing you can drink is definitely water for your overall health!

Remember To Keep Clean

Keeping clean is important for your overall health, as there are quite a few health issues that come with not keeping clean such as skin infections.Not to mention that there can be a build-up of bacteria which can lead to giving off a bad smell. This can create germs that could make you sick or others. So, keep on top of keeping clean and make sure you clean your body and hair properly.

Alcohol and Smoking

It has been proven that alcohol has been proven to damage our organs if we drink it excessively. The liver is one of these organs that can be affected massively if you drink a lot. However, a drink now and again will not cause excessive damage to your body.Smoking is also very damaging, even if you only have one every so often. There are a lot of toxic chemicals that can damage your health over the long term. This can also damage your vital organs and give you a “smokers cough”. Both alcohol and smoking are extremely damaging to your health so these are the ones that you should cut down on.

Dentist

Visiting the dentist regularly is very important to maintain good oral health. You might think your mouth is healthy, but there is every chance that it might not be as our oral health is often neglected. Maybe there are a few signs of early tooth decay or even gum disease which you might not notice. Visiting the dentist at least twice a year can help you get those oral health issues recognised early enough.Dentists can recognise any health issues that you might have in your mouth. Tooth decay is one of these issues that you might not notice until it starts bothering you. Going to the dentist will enable these issues to be identified and treated before it causes too much damage to your mouth. They can also give your teeth a good clean as well just to keep on top of them.Dentists can recognise more aesthetic issues as well and serious ones. Oral cancer is one of those that you will not notice until it is too late. If it is spotted early enough then you could potentially save your life, so a regular dental visit is definitely worth it.Going to the dentist at least twice a year is a must just to keep your oral health in check. Some people will need to go to the dentist a lot because they have all on 4 dental implants which will need regular checkups, whereas usually two visits a year is enough.

Get Plenty of Exercise

Exercising is promoted to us at an early age. It is a way of keeping your fitness levels high as well as keeping healthy. However, if you are not into your sports then do not worry, as there are so many different forms of exercise that can keep you healthy.Many activities are not too physically challenging but can keep you healthy. For example, start walking to work instead of using public transport. If you aren’t within walking distance of your workplace, then go for a walk at lunchtime instead of sitting at your desk.There are many different types of exercises you can do to keep fit. Going to the gym or playing for a sports team are just two ways you can stay fit. There are many simple ways to exercise such as basic yoga or step-ups. Just some exercise is better than none.Everyone has their preferred exercises and some people will love it, others will hate it. Scientists recommend that we should have at least 150 minutes a week which sounds a lot but it isn’t when broken up across the days. This depends on how intense your exercises are. Exercising is what keeps our bodies healthy and also helps us to keep on top of weight (nutrition also matters with your weight). 

Daisy M

Monday, 31 January 2022

37 Simple Ways to Love a Woman

 Is this your first time having a girlfriend? Are you getting married soon, and you want to be a better husband to your wife? Or do you simply want to know how to properly love a woman because you want to prepare for your future relationship?Wanting to be a better man for a woman you consider special is a noble desire. But, of course, you know she deserves the best, so you have to work on becoming better. Thus, if you want to be a better boyfriend or husband, you can instill the following ways to love a woman.

Treat Her Like A Queen

1. Be A Gentleman To Her.

Always treat your girl like you would want your mom, sister, or daughter to be treated by others. For instance, carry the heavy stuff for her and always let her choose from the menu first during dates.

2. Cook Her Favorite Food.

Most women love eating, so make it a habit to cook your girl’s favorite meals. She would love you all the more for them!

3. Give Her A Massage After A Stressful Day.

Does she always come home exhausted from work? Give her a relaxing foot and body massage before going to sleep.

4. Serve Her When She Is Tired.

Aside from the massage, she will surely appreciate it if you prepare breakfast or dinner for her during tiring workdays.

5. Give Her Presents.

Simple gifts during ordinary days, such as chocolates, comfy slippers, or lipsticks of her favorite shades, will make her eyes sparkle for sure.

6. Help Her With Chores, Especially The Heavy Ones.

Do the laundry and clean the bathroom if you want her to see you as a superhero. Washing and drying the dishes every meal will also make her smile.

7. Take Care Of Her.

Pamper your girl whether she is sick or not. For example, encourage her to get enough sleep, buy her vitamins, and deliver lunch to her office.

Be Proud Of Her

8. Hold Her Hand In The Public.

Holding her hand while walking in the mall or strolling around the park will make her feel how proud you are of your relationship.

9. Flex Her On Social Media.

You do not lose privacy by simply posting your photos together on social media once in a while.

10. Encourage Her To Pursue Her Dreams.

Make your girl feel that you believe in her capabilities. Be supportive of her dreams.

11. Praise Her Infront Of Other People.

Whether you are with your social circle or hers, do not forget to mention something good about your partner, like how a thoughtful or hardworking woman she is.

12. Compliment How She Looks.

Before going out, tell her that you like her dress or how she looks good with her hairstyle.

13. Introduce Her To Your Family And Friends.

If you are new together, do not hide her from your peers or family. Bring your girlfriend to your friend’s party and invite her to your parents’ house for dinner.

14. Celebrate Her Achievements.

Be her no. 1 fan. Take her out on a celebration date whenever she has accomplished a goal.

Value Her Trust

15. Do Not Lie To Her.

Never ever lie to her about anything. Once she caught you lying even once, it would be hard for her to believe you again.

16. Never Flirt With Other Girls.

There is no such thing as harmless flirting. It is still cheating, which you will not do to someone you love.

17. Give Her Access To Your Phone And Social Media Accounts.

Transparency will help your girl trust you more since she is assured that you do not hide anything from her.

18. Be Open To Her About Your Temptations.

Being open about your weakness is another way of telling her that you are fighting your demons for her.

19. Share Your Secrets With Her.

Your girlfriend or wife will feel honored to be trusted.

20. Do Not Badmouth Her To Other People.

Even if you have a misunderstanding, avoid criticizing your girl in front of others. You cannot take your words back once you have reconciled.

21. Keep Your Intimate Moments To Yourself.

Your partner would not be too happy once she finds out that you share your private moments with your friends.

Give Her Freedom

22. Do Not Stop Her From Seeing Her Friends.

You would not want her to keep you from your friends, right? So then, do not do it to her too.

23. Avoid Being Easily Jealous.

While a bit of jealousy can spice up your relationship, too much can be toxic. So avoid being jealous of every guy she talks to.

24. Do Not Be Possessive Of Her.

She may be your girlfriend or wife, but you do not own her. She still has the right to decide for herself, have her own social life, and pursue what she wants.

25. Respect Her Opinions And Beliefs.

You should not impose your principles, beliefs, and preferences on her. You have to respect your differences.

Protect Her From Yourself

26. Avoid Being Rude To Her In Words Or Actions.

As a gentleman, you should avoid raising your tone and using harsh words to your woman even if you are angry. Instead, do your best to treat her gently all the time.

27. Never Hurt Her.

No matter how intense your fight is, be careful not to hurt your girl physically or emotionally. Just leave the scene if you feel like losing your patience.

28. Do Not Embarrass Her In Public.

Do not argue with your girlfriend or wife in front of other people. If you want to correct her, do it privately.

29. Be More Understanding.

Women are prone to mood swings due to hormonal changes, so be more patient and understanding.

30. Do Not Compare Her To Other Women.

Your girl is unique. You cannot inspire her to be better by citing other women you admire. It would only make her insecure and jealous.

31. Be Humble And Apologize When You Are Wrong.

Do not let your pride ruin your relationship. Admit it and apologize sincerely when you know you have committed a mistake.

32. Avoid Doing The Things You Know Can Upset Her.

To avoid hurting your girl’s feelings, be sensitive to her dislikes.

Be A Positive Influence On Her

33. Lead Her To Be Closer To God.

In a spiritual realm, the man is called to be the family leader. So, bring her to church, initiate prayer and Bible study time with her, and make it your relationship goal to be more Christlike.

34. Change Yourself For The Better.

If you love your girl, you should pursue being the better version of yourself. Get rid of your bad habits and attitude.

35. Inspire Her To Take Care Of Herself.

Why not introduce some health and fitness goals to her? Then, plan your workout schedules together and decide on having healthy meal plans.

36. Encourage Her To Focus On Her Priorities.

Instead of being a distraction, help her focus on her priorities and responsibilities.

37. Correct Her Gently.

Love does not tolerate mistakes. So if you know your partner is doing something wrong, you have to rebuke her gently.

Love With All Your Heart

Women, in general, are complex beings. You need enough patience and understanding to love a woman. But, more than all the abovementioned ways, you can be the best partner to your girlfriend or wife if you fully commit yourself to the relationship. So, be ready for sacrifices and compromises along the way.

Cyril Abello

Is Online Dating Worth It?

 The search for love in the digital age tends to stir up a lot of anxiety. If you've ever heard stories from your friends about their bad dates, you might reasonably approach dating apps with caution. But just as online dating can foster some comically bad experiences, there are plenty of benefits as well. Many of us know couples who seem so perfectly matched that it's almost impossible to believe they met on opposite sides of a screen. When it comes down to it, does online dating actually work? While you might be worried it's not a good idea (or even a waste of time), like all matters in love, it has its pros and cons. We decided to bring the question to licensed marriage and family therapist and relationship expert Lisa Marie Bobby, Ph.D., of Growing Self Counseling and Coaching.Dating apps can lead to superficiality and ghosting, but there are also many positives. "While online dating has some potential for pitfalls compared to meeting people in real life, the volume of possibilities is much higher," says Bobby. "That increases the chances that you'll meet someone you're truly compatible with." So let's put the fears to rest—and put the internet to the test. Read on to learn expert advice on how well online dating really works.

What Research Says About Dating Apps

Research shows that online dating is on the rise. A Pew Research Center study conducted in October 2019 found that 30 percent of Americans have used online dating, compared to just 11 percent in 2013.1 Of those, 12 percent have gotten married or been in a committed relationship with someone they met through online dating—a notable increase from just 3 percent in 2013.Online dating appears to be a practical way to date for most people. According to the study, roughly 60 percent of participants have had positive experiences with dating platforms. Many people have success finding romantic partners online, whether they're looking for something casual or long term. Overall, the majority of participants found it relatively easy to meet potentially compatible partners in terms of those they found attractive or with whom they shared hobbies and interests.Research shows, however, there are negative side effects of online dating, particularly for young women. According to the survey, 60 percent of women ages 18 to 34 say someone on an app or dating site kept contacting them after they said they weren't interested while about the same percentage of women in that age group reported that they were sent unsolicited sexually explicit pictures or messages.Bobby says the reason for many of the negative aspects of online dating could be a lack of what she calls a "shared community." "Connecting through online dating feels much more like meeting a virtual stranger and having to establish points of meaningful connection with little real-world experience to go on," she says. "Furthermore, the absence of a shared community or relationships make it easier to ghost or be inconsiderate without concern of consequences to your reputation or comfort in your community." 

How to Get the Most Out of Online Dating

Before you download an app or two and create your profile, Bobby recommends some soul-searching. The last thing you want to do is start matching with people online, get to talking, and realize you have no idea what you're looking for out of a partner or a relationship. "Spend time and energy getting clear about who you are and what you really want in a relationship, and think about who your ideal partner is," says Bobby. "Also, think about what your ideal partner is seeking in a prospective mate and how you can connect with them authentically."It's also important to do some research about the app you decide to download and find out how it works. Then, spend some time and energy on your profile. Choose pictures and prompts that show who you are, what you like, and how you present yourself to the world. If it's clear you haven't put any thought or effort into your profile, potential partners might assume you'll take the same approach in a relationship.Once you've created your profile, don't expect to meet "the one" right away, and prepare to spend a significant amount of time vetting potential partners. But since we don't have all the time in the world to swipe, having a system to weed out those with whom you are incompatible is key. "Develop a process to help you cut through the fluff and get to know who someone really is as quickly as possible," she says. "A five-minute call will often tell you all you need to know."

What to Avoid When Using Dating Apps

Odds are, if you've participated in online dating, you have a few bad date stories. Often the cause of these negative experiences is that your expectations don't match up with reality. Bobby says that while online dating requires some "marketing savvy" and the ability to, in essence, sell yourself online, you shouldn't sacrifice the truth to come across as what you perceive to be "better.""Never misrepresent yourself or try to appear as something you're not," she says. "You might get online interactions, but they'll quickly fizzle when it becomes apparent that you are different than what your potential partner was expecting." If you're looking for a truly meaningful relationship, concealing aspects of yourself that you're afraid others won't like or accept on your profile is counterproductive. Be authentic, and you'll attract those with similar values.On the other hand, avoid falling victim to someone you suspect is being deceitful on their profile by noticing red flags. Not everyone has social media or updates it regularly, but most people who do will be glad to share their profiles with you when asked. And most of the time, if someone is truly interested, they'll hop on a phone call or video chat with you before meeting up, even if they feel a bit awkward. Going into a date "cold" with someone you aren't entirely sure about can often end up being a waste of time and lead to disappointment. Lastly, when you do get that match or first date, it's important for you and a prospective partner to feel a certain chemistry, but don't rely on it completely. "When you are evaluating potential partners, do not make the mistake of prioritizing 'chemistry' over character," says Bobby. Too much wit and charm may give you butterflies, but it can also be a sign that the person is a "player" or even a narcissist.

How Likely Are You to Find "The One" Online?

A healthy relationship is totally possible whether you're meeting people in person or online, but the two methods differ for a variety of reasons. The fact is, there are positives to meeting IRL. When two people meet organically, it's probably because they already have something in common, like friends or hobbies. "This natural convergence of circumstances, relationships, or interests is a strength for a new relationship," says Bobby. "They provide a budding couple with more opportunities for authentic connection as well as more social pressure to treat each other decently, even if it's not ultimately a good match." But that doesn't mean online dating can't be equally as successful. Since everyone on a dating site is (presumably) available, you have ample opportunities to put yourself out there and find a good match. When you engage in social events where you're likely to meet new people, the pool of those who are single and looking is much smaller than when you're on an app or dating site where everyone is in the same boat as you."Singles seeking relationships are looking to connect online," says Bobby. "That reality means that it's highly likely of finding 'the one" because they're in the same place, also looking for you!" If you're straightforward about what you want, it increases your chances of finding a good partner even more.No matter your intentions, there seems to be something for everyone when dating online—just be clear about your expectations. Embrace new experiences, learn a little about yourself, and don't forget to have fun. You may even meet your dream partner.

Hadley Mendelsohn

Friday, 7 January 2022

If You Notice This in Your Fridge, Throw Out Your Leftovers, Experts Warn

 This is a major sign that your leftovers may not be safe to eat.

Most people's refrigerators have seen their fair share of leftovers. Leftovers can serve as a quick and easy meal, not to mention significantly reducing food waste—that is, if you get to eating them instead of letting them waste away in your fridge. But are all leftovers safe to eat? Experts say there's one thing you should check in your fridge before warming up last night's meal that will let you know if you can safely eat it or should throw it away. Read on to discover a major sign you should toss your leftovers.

If your fridge temperature is higher than 40 degrees Fahrenheit, throw away your leftovers.

Your leftovers should be left in a refrigerator that is 40 degrees Fahrenheit or lower for them to be safe enough for you to reheat and eat. "The key to safely reheating food is to ensure it was cooled and stored properly prior to reheating," explains Alexis Martinez, a nutrition coach and founder of the nutrition and wellness website Healthy Brown Girl.According to Lisa Richards, a nutritionist and author of The Candida Diet, this is because most microbes and pathogens that cause foodborne illnesses end up present in certain foods due to improper cooling or handling. The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) says that Listeria, one type of bacteria that causes these illnesses, is particularly prone to growing in refrigerators where the temperature is above 40 degrees Fahrenheit.Martinez says pathogens are most likely to grow when food is between 70 and 125 degrees Fahrenheit. "As a general rule it is best to reheat all food to 165 degrees Fahrenheit throughout and allow it to have been at that temperature for at least 15 seconds," Richards notes.

You can check your refrigerator temperature with an appliance thermometer.

The FDA says you should be keeping your refrigerator temperature at or below 40 degrees Fahrenheit and checking the temperature periodically. According to the agency, you can check your refrigerator temperature by using an appliance thermometer. "Appliance thermometers are the best way of knowing these temperatures and are generally inexpensive," the FDA states on its website.The U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) says that appliance thermometers should still be able to indicate the temperature in your fridge, even if your power is out. "If you're not sure a particular food is cold enough, take its temperature with a food thermometer," the USDA advises. As long as it reads below 40 degrees Fahrenheit as well, the food should be safe enough to refreeze or reheat.

You could end up hospitalized if you eat food contaminated with Listeria.

Listeria is the one of the biggest bacteria risks possible with refrigerated leftovers. "Unlike most bacteria, Listeria germs can grow and spread in the refrigerator," the FDA warns. "The germs not only multiply at the cool temperature, they could contaminate your refrigerator and spread to other foods there, increasing the likelihood that you and your family will become sick."Unfortunately, this bacteria is also one of the most dangerous, as eating food contaminated with Listeria can make you so sick that you have to be hospitalized. Certain people, like pregnant women, older adults, and immunocompromised individuals, are even more at risk for listeriosis—the illness cause by Listeria—and getting infected can be fatal for them. According to the FDA, listeriosis has a high mortality rate of 20 to 30 percent, with more than 90 percent of people who develop the illness needing to be hospitalized.Listeriosis can cause a variety of symptoms depending on who is infected and where in the body the bacteria has invaded. Some common symptoms include fever, muscle aches, severe headache, nausea, vomiting, stiff neck, confusion, loss of balance, and convulsion, per the FDA. If you're pregnant, you're not likely to have gastrointestinal symptoms, and your only sign of listeriosis might be fever.

You should never eat leftovers than have been left in your fridge for more than four days either.

Your fridge temperature is not the only safety indicator for leftovers. No matter the temperature, most leftovers are only safe in your refrigerator for three to four days. "Leftover cooked food may be stored in the refrigerator for up to three to four days. During this time, you can reheat the leftovers to 165 degrees Fahrenheit," the USDA explains.The only exception to this rule is if you have already reheated them. According to the USDA, you can extend the life of your leftovers by reheating them before the four days are up. "After each reheating, leftovers will be safe in the fridge for an additional three to four days," the agency says. But the quality of your food will decrease every time it is reheated, so the USDA advises that you reheat only the amount needed each time.

"Cooked foods that cannot be used within four days should be frozen for longer, safe storage," the agency states. "Leftovers are safe in the freezer indefinitely, but they are at best quality for a few months."


Kali Coleman